Why did the window break? I threw a pig out it.

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A duck walks into a bar. The bartender-"Hey we don't serve your kind here!" The duck-"What ducks?" The bartender -"No Jewish"

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2 ducks walk into a bar. The first orders a drink, drinks it, and drops dead. The other duck said, "Bar tender! What did you put in my friends drink?" The bar tender said, "Poison."

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roses are grey, violets are grey, i'm colourblind and shit at poetry

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your mother is so rather large that when she stepped onto a scale, it stated her exact body weight which was 280 pounds. Which come to think of it isn't that big considering that obesity is now the norm and average people are referred to as abnormal.

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Q: What is hard and long on a man? A: His wife's funeral

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Whats the difference between a black man and a pizza? A pizza is an inanimate object, while a black man is a person. racist F.u.c.k.

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what did the little girl do after drinking a smoothie? she choked and died a painful death.

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Q-- Why did the boy stop playing football? A -- He had to go for his tea

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Q: what is more sad than being alone A: being alone with lots of cats

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Why was timmy crying? He gave his grandmother AIDs...

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Why did Sally fall off the tree? Because Sally weighed 500 lbs and it was a bamboo tree.

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A rhinoceros walks into a bar. As it felt threatened by the presence of many humans, the rhino attacks and kills several people with the big horn on its nose.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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What do you call a guy with newmonya? Not good at spelling

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A man walks into a bar. It hurt.

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Chuck Norris doesn't sleep. He has insomnia.

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hrih

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Q: what do you call a person who's ass is dumb A: a dumbass

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What do you call a donkey walking backwards a confused donkey

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whats white and smells like black paint? nothing, white paint even though it is still paint has a slightly different smell due to the difference in dye colors used to make it

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What did one man say to the other? I'm a Mormon.

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Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Give a man a gun and he'll build you a refrigerator.

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My Roomate-(crying in the fetal position for the love of his life has been murderer) Me- (laughing) I have a problem

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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