What did the homeless get for Christmas? Nothing By Nathaniel c

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what's the difference between natives and dogs? people enjoy having dogs in their houses

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Whats the fastest way to a man's heart?? Saw through his breastplate.

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What would be funny? Seeing justin beiber 's penis.

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Gale swallows.

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What's green and has 4 wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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Why did the girl say 'baa'? Because she was a lamb.

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roses are grey, violets are grey, i'm colourblind and shit at poetry

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what do you call a black man flying a plane? a pilot you racist.

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Knock knock Who's there? Timmy Timmy who? Timmy Smith

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what is long,hard and holds semen,a submarine , i spelled seamen wrong

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing set? She had no arms.

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What did the idiot call his pet zebra? Charlie. The fact that the man is an idiot is irrelevant.

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What's worse than getting Alzheimer's? ........what am I doing here.....

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What is worse than finding a dead mouse in your loaf of bread? A lot of things since you were able to sue the bread company for tens of thousands of dollars.

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Q: Why did the bully hit the kid A:Because he is a bully-I thought that would have been self explanitory.

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two muffins were in an oven. one muffin says, "gee, its hot in here." the other one says, "AH! A TALKING MUFFIN!"

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was recently released from prison for violent crimes.

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Why was the boy sad? His friend stabbed him with a fork. Also, his mother died. Also, his dad raped him Also, he has a chode. And it really sucks when you have a chode.

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Why coulden't the fish swim? He got poked in the eye with my nipple. My nipples get really big when I'm swimming in cold water.

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What's black and blue and red all over? A person who was just in a fight.

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Two black guys walk into a country club and ask to play a round of golf. They are turned away because the aren't members of the club.

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What would George Washington do if he was alive today? Scream and scrach at the top of his coffin.

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Your momma's so ugly she adopted you because she had a problem attracting men.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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