How do you tell if someone is a Jew? Ask them politely.

Why did the chicken cross the road? A scorpion was trying to sting it in the anus and it wanted to escape the undoubtedly painful consequences.

Why did the man punch his wife? Because he was angry

What is black, white and red all over? A nun in a blender

9 out of 10 people enjoy gang rape.

What cheese is not yours? The one that you didn't buy.

Yo momma so ugly just after she was born, her mother said, "What a treasure!" and her father said, "Yea, let's go bury it!"

you: knock knock person: who's there you: interrupting cow person: interrupting cow you:MOOOOOOOOO

Q:What colors make black? A:Nothing Thats a Shade

Why did the golfer take an extra pair of pants to the golf course? In case they ripped and he needed a replacement.

A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

yo mama so fat that she should be concerned because diabetes is a serious issue

Q: How did that man get two black eyes? A: He was born!

whats the hardest part of roller skating. Telling your dad that you are gay.

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Why didn't Helen Keller have headphones? Because they weren't invented

I have sex daily, I mean dyslexia.

Why Did the baby cross the street? He was stapled to the chicken's back

Q. You are driving a car. In front of you there is a camion driving at your same speed. Behind you there is a helicopter flying at your same speed at the ground level. On your left there is an ambulance driving at your same speed and on your right there is a ravine. How do you get out from this horrible situation? A. Get off the carousel.

America Votes

Why did the deaf man go to the concert? He had recently acquired a brand new hearing aid which meant that he was able to hear much better and decided that he wanted to listen to some music.

what the hell happened to your face

What do you call an animal who is purple and feeds on grass? Well his name is Timmy, he is a 6 year old boy and has been diagnosed with a rare deadly disease that turns his skin purple and has removed him so far from reality that he has begin to feed on his front lawn.

Whats orange and has stripes? - a tiger

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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