sorry son your nanas been put down

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What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One is fun to hit with a sledgehammer...and the other is a watermelon.

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What is Black, White and Asian? A Panda Bear

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How do you put a baby to sleep? Snap its neck.

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What do you call Justin Bieber's assassin? A hero doing a noble favor to the community.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

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If you walked into a grocery store right in the middle of Cuba what won't you see? The missing Malaysian MH370 Boeing.

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What is black, white, and red all over A penguin in a blender

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Simon walks into a bar. He orders his favorite beer. The bartender says "Hey Simon, I see you're back with the usual, aye?" Simon says "Touch you tongue to your elbow." The bartender couldn't do it.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Obama. Obama who? Barack Obama, President of the United States. I was wondering if I could borrow a cup of sugar. I'm baking cookies for my family, because they really like my cookies.

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Why is a T-shirt like a topaz statue of the Archangel Gabriel? They both start with 'T'.

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roses are blue violetrs are green im shooting heroine into my head

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Barack Obama plays basketball

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What do u do if a blonde throws a bomb at u Trigger the bomb and throw it back

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what did the duck say to the other duck Quack

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What do Miley and Billy Ray Cyrus have in common? Half their DNA

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How do you kill a fish? You bite off its head.

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Your Face... It's Beautiful.

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So lion bites off a mans foot. He bleeds to death.

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I <3 Hitler

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Why did the chicken cross the road? So he could DO YO MOMM!!!

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a chicken walks into a bar and gets drunk. the locals then proceed to tell the police because the chicken was harrassing people after he got drunk

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What do you call someone with no body and no nose? Nobody nose.

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A bartender walks into a bar, and starts his shift.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops