Why was the truck driver speeding down the road? To get to his mother's funeral. Why didn't the baby cross the road? Because it didn't have any guts.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels.

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What do you call an apple, an orange, and a pear in a bowl? Fruit

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Why Did The Boy Fall Off The Swing? Because He Had No Arms.

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here's my two cents worth! *hands you two pennies , entire life savings*

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What's worse than failing your midterms? Child abuse.

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What did the strawberry say to the grape? Nothing, inanimate objects can't use verbal communication.

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A horse walks into a bar and sits down on a stool. He orders a beer. He drinks his beer and leaves. Life continues on as it was.

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What do you call your mom? Mom

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my throat Really started to hurt, like reallly badly, and i remember On sponge bob, he laughed so much his laugh box broke. well, my throat really hurts. please help! can i get my laugh box back? will i never be able to laugh again and have to get it replaced like squidward did?!!? please answer, i have a friend who would probably give me part of her laugh box, but she Laughs like a hyena

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I like doodle. XoXo Jamie

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What's the difference between gun and penis? A child doesn't start to cry when gun shoots in its mouth.

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Q: What do you call a black pilot. A: A pilot you racist.

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two peanuts were walking down the street. but one was unsalted...

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What is Lady Gaga's real name? Who the crap knows?

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Knock, Knock whos there? Jesus Jesus who? Jesus Christ

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What did hitler do with the vegetarians? Nothing, because he was one.

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Senior Sergeant Thomas the officer investigating your current rape and insect charges. Please open the door now.

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Why did the man hang himself? Because his pistol misfired.

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How do you get a cat out of a tree? You throw a brick at it.

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What's the difference between the son of a prostitute and Luke Skywalker? Luke knew who his father was.

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Man 1: What's the difference between an elephant and a mailbox? Man 2: I don't know. Man 1: You'd make a terrible postman

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Why was the girl stupid? Because she had a low IQ

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Beacuse he got kicked out of the bar

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops