How do you fit 1,000 Jews in a Volkswagen? Trick question, you can't.

What couldn't the Asian drive? Because he had just gotten laser eye surgery, and the doctor recommended that he didn't drive for a few days.

Your mom smells so bad that she proceeded to take a shower and then didnt smell bad at all.

how do you stop a baby crying hit it with a brick.

My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well, I was amazed, I never knew they worked.

Did you hear about the kidnapping yesterday? He slept for at least 3 hours.

what did the duck say to the chicken .nothing

Why did the blonde fall down? She got shot in the head.

why was the little girl crying? because her dad hit her.

Why did the deaf man go to the concert? He had recently acquired a brand new hearing aid which meant that he was able to hear much better and decided that he wanted to listen to some music.

Wanna hear a joke!? Miley Cyrus.

YouTube comment: If I get a cent for every pixel on the screen. I would have... $960 for a 224p video $2049.6 240p video $1296 for a 270p video $2304 for a 360p video $4099.2 for a 480p video $9984 for a 520p video $9216 for a 720p video $20736 for a 1080p video $125829.12 for a 2304p video ... I would be RICH!!

knock knock whos there ? Jordan Jordan who ? Jordan Walters

whats silver and cries? a coin, although it can't cry because its a coin. So it's just silver

Did you hear about that show where two crazy guy got on stage and the show had to be canceled. I didnt either.

Your mother is so dumb. It's a good thing she knows sign language.

"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Come in" "Come in who?"

You're momma's so fat, she's got high cholesterol.

A man walked in a bar had 4 drinks and walked home because drunk driving is dangerous

Why did the boy on stilts pick up the phone? Because it was ringing.

Whats the difference between a new ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a new ferrari in my garage.

roses are red violets are blue the stems are green they smell good

two muffins were in an oven. one muffin says, "gee, its hot in here." the other one says, "AH! A TALKING MUFFIN!"

The Colts this year.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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