What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A pilot

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Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

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3 aliens landed on earth. They all wanted to learn english. The first alien went to an opera class and learned "mi mi mi mi mi." The second alien went to a military camp and learned "guns and bazookas, guns and bazookas!" The third alien went to a candy shop and learned "he stole my lollipop!" After all of that, they went to their spaceship and saw a dead man and a cop that said, "which one of you three killed this man?" The first alien said "mi mi mi mi mi." The cop said "what did you kill him with?" The second alien said "guns and bazookas, guns and bazookas!" The cop then said "why did you kill him?" The third alien said "he stole my lollipop!"

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Your mother is so dumb. It's a good thing she knows sign language.

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What's more stinky than a fart? More farts.

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Nate has 32 candy bars. he eats 28 of them. What is he left with? 4 candy bars

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Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black. ~Stevie Wonder

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Viciously beating your children with other recently beaten children.

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How do you make a clown stop smiling? hit him with an axe

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Why did the boy on stilts pick up the phone? Because it was ringing.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? know on knows as he can't talk

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What black and blue and red all over? My mom after my dad comes back from the bar.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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A Asian man with a boner runs and hits the wall... He beaks his nose.

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69.9

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Did you hear about the guy who fell off the mountain? Oh, well he died

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Knock, Knock Who is there? Yo Yo who? *the man ran away and was never seen again, because he had nowhere to stay*

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Why was the globe sad? Because it was cut in half.

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Your mama's so fat, she gets confused with Santa Claus.

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whats white and smells like black paint? nothing, white paint even though it is still paint has a slightly different smell due to the difference in dye colors used to make it

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That joke was so funny that I fell off my dinosaur. Then afterwards had to be put in a rehabilitation center because I am schizophrenic and dinosaurs are extinct.

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Your moms so fat She should get some help because there's nothing good about being fat

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26.5% of Americans are obese.

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Roses are red It's 4 in the morning I have full blown aids I'm going to bed now, this is boring

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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