Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Give a man a gun and he'll build you a refrigerator.

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Ask me how old my cat is. How old's your cat? I don't know.

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What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

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what do you call skiediving? a very fun but moderatly dangerouse sport that many people have fun doing from the ages of 19 to 31

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Knock, knock. Who's there? John. Oh, hey! Come in.

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Why did the window break? I threw a pig out it.

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Why do immigrants move to the UK? To seek a better life

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why did the chicken cross the road ??? why would you care??

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Why did the hipster hate black people? Because he was racist.

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What's worse than being gay? Dying in a gas chamber in the Holocaust.

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Knock Knock Who's there? It's the postman, I have a package you need to sign for.

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What do you get when you cross a rhino and an elephant? Two angry pachyderms.

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Q: What is hard and long on a man? A: His wife's funeral

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what did the little girl do after drinking a smoothie? she choked and died a painful death.

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Q: why did Helen Keller's dog kill himself? A: Because he couldn't stand to see his owner suffer through blindness and deafness and being the butt of hundreds of offensive and hurtful jokes.

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What do you call a black person who drives a plane? A pilot.

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Q: what is more sad than being alone A: being alone with lots of cats

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Why did the cow cross the road? To get to the slaughter house

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Why was the boy sad? His friend stabbed him with a fork. Also, his mother died. Also, his dad raped him Also, he has a chode. And it really sucks when you have a chode.

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Your mama's so fat, she gets confused with Santa Claus.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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Two muffins are in an oven. One says "It's getting hot in here". The other one starts to reply but then it's internal organs burst from the heat.

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What do you call a donkey walking backwards a confused donkey

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acuna

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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