What's black and white and red all over? The dead kitten on the road.

What's worse than getting an erection in church Getting an erection while naked in church

Whats black and white and red all over? Genital Warts...

why did the chicken cross the road because he wanted to get to chicken to have safe sex

Guess what? You guessed it.

why did the alien eat the cow? peer pressure

What's red and weighs a metric ton? An apple, my scale wasn't calibrated

What do you get when you kill justin beiber? A medal..

Knock Knock. Who's there? An astronaut. He's all alone in the vacuum of space. No one hears him knocking.

What did Stephen Hawking say when his computer crashed? Nothing.

A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen." The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her, "That driver just insulted me!" The man says, "You go right up there and tell him off! Go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you."

what do you get when you cross a broken arm and a broken leg? .... a broken head.

My name is me I like fired chicken!

What noise annoys a noisy oyster? Hispanics with their loud car stereos.

Roses are red Violets are blue I am a cow moo

A guy finds a lamp in the desert and rubs it 3 times.. No genie appears because there is no such thing as Magic.

Q: Why did the mom try to wake up a sleeping bag? A: Because it's morning and her kid is curled up inside fast asleep

Why couldn't the Asian couple have a white baby? Because two Wongs were mixed up in the paperwork so as a result the other Wong family ended up getting the child.

when life gives you lemons... squeeze the juice into your eyes.

Why did Hellen Keller's dog run away? It didn't. She didn't have a dog.

What is the last bit of snow to fall from the sky called? Nothing. Meteorologists have not come up with a scientific term for this phenomenon.

How do chinese name their kids? They drop silverware

Ya know what's funny? A joke well-told by a professional comedian.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had down-syndrome

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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