What do you call a spaceman on Mars? Confused, because with the current technology it is impossible to send a human into space and onto Mars.

What's the difference between a whore and a blonde? There is not enough information to answer this question.

Two goldfish are swimming in the ocean. One says to another, "I don't think we will be able to survive in this salty environment".

What was the racist kid's least favorite ice cream flavor? Chocolate for an unrelated reason.

Your mom is so fat, that your gonna get a brother soon.

A kid walks into a ctholic school and asks about the therory of evolution.

your mommas so stupid she tried to climb mountain dew well im glad your mom is intrested in trying new things

Why was the Jew evicted from his home? He forgot to pay the rent

i hate this glue. give me one new or i will poo.

What's worse than losing the remote? Dying of cancer.

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie roll pop? After one hour, twelve minutes, and fifty-three seconds, Dave calculated that it approximately took 247 licks.

how do you make a baby cry? put a nail through its foot

A dog walks into a bar, animal control is called and he is put down as he is suffering from rabies.

bologna

What's the difference between a Pimple and a Priest? One waits till you're 13 to "cum" on your face.

A Brunette, a Redhead and a Blond all jump off a cliff, which one will hit the ground last? Since the acceleration of gravity is 9.8 m/s they will all hit the ground simultaneously and with enough force to completly shatter their bodys making body recovery extreemly difficult. They must have had a hard life.

Q: What lives in holes? A: Jerks.

A kid a jew and a child molester walk into a room . what happens next? Nothing there in a room.

joke hahhahahah where did u find that joke, on the internet

Hi. P.S: You have aids. P.P.S: Purple penis pumpernickel pie puppets.

womens rights.

Q: Why should you never let Jerry Sandusky babysit your children? A: Because, in November of 2011, Sandusky was arrested and charged with 40 counts of sexual abuse of young boys over a 15-year period. A man with this type of background does not seem like a an ideal choice for a babysitter.

Why was Edgar sad at the swimming pool? Edgar had been taking swimming lessons for a few weeks, on a tuesday-thursday basis, and was not learning how to swim as well as he would have liked. His instructer, Ms. Herpina was also very rude and generally disrespectful to Edgar. As a result of him seeing the lack of progress, and his dislike of his teacher, one day he quit going to his lessons and went to the local Dairy Queen instead with his girlfriend, Susie. Little did he know, his mother had also gone out to buy him DairyQueen, as a celebration to him becoming better at swimming. When she saw him at Dairy Queen, she was very angry at her son, who had lied to her about going to that days' lesson, and had also lied to her about not having a girlfriend. After his mom told his girlfriend that they couldn't date, she took a distraught Edgar to their small apartment. Edgar had always hated this apartment, ever since the first day they moved in as a result from the lack of money to afford a nicer area. After his older brother David stole all that money from his mother to buy drugs a few years back, his life hasn't been the same. His mother was forced to move into an apartment with few luxories, and Edgar was constantly jealous of his friends at school, especially Jason, the dark haired boy who always bragged about how good he was at his PSP games. Edgar only wanted happiness for at least a little while, but was quickly forced back to the pool. He was embarassed at the fact that he couldn't swim, and all the popular girls at the pool were making fun of him. It had been a rough life for Edgar, and he was still only seven years of age. This, my child, is why Edgar was sad at the swimming pool.

The Charlotte Bobcats

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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