Eating a bagel, the man was overcome with disappointment, he thought that he had purchased a donut. He later hung himself.

Why did the elephant cross the road? I don't know

there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

What did the loser say to the winner? Good game

a black guy walks into a black bar

Why did the chicken cross the road? - To rape you. Knock Knock. Who's there? The Chicken.

Relax, anyway I hope its just the not not hypnotic suggestion, it would be really disappointing to to know that you are high on weed, even if it is very relaxing, not that I would know, I tried valium once, it kinda increased that sensation you have tenfold. Anyway, what I meant to say was, would you kindly tell me what size your breasts are? Do you shave down there?

Phew, I was like thinking all like "I am really into this guy, we can like chat like this and stuff too right?"

What happened when the paraplegic man went into the bar? Nothing the man couldnt get into the bar because the bar has no wheelchair ramp.

What were the muslims doing on the plane? Probably going somewhere that was too far to walk or drive.... just like everyone else on the plane.

What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Bat-mobile? - "Robin, get in the Bat-mobile"

a dedicated fat guy joins a kung fu dojo he is asked to dedicate his like to his kung fu the fat man dose not he is already dedicated to being a fat guy

What's hiding in Redfoo (from LMFAO)'s afro? Nobody knows...

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie roll tootsie pop?

USA, one of the richest and most proud nations on this plan- VIETNAM 9/11 BYE FOR NOW!!!

What did the girl without arms get for her birthday? A pair of gloves.

Heskey time.

what do you call a pie in a roll a roll and pie

Justin Bieber

Two men walk into a bar. The third seeing the protruding bar goes home to find his entire family dead from anthrax.

Knock knock *the family is on vacation and doesn't answer*

What happens when Chuck Norris jumps in the air? He lands.

A boy asks a wolf, "whats the time mr wolf?" The wolf does not answer. Wolves possess neither watches, nor the neurone in their brain required to talk.

What do you do when its night time and you go downstairs and see your tv floating in the air? you say PUT IT DOWN N I G E R

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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