What do you do when a blonde takes the pin out of a grenade and throws it at you? Take cover as there is a person close to you wielding an active grenade.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What does a homeless man get for Valentines Day? Divorce papers

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A princess kisses a frog to acquire a prince. Then gets arrested for beastiality.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Your mom is so fat that she steps on the scale and sees a relatively large number compared to the rest of human society.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Knock knock Who's there? Impatient Hellen Keller. Impatient Hellen Keller who? ...

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did the dealer say to the addict? Sup.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

EVERYONE NEEDS TO UNDERSTAND!! DYSLEXICS ARE TEOPLE POO!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did Hitler commit suicide? Because he was completely depressed and overwhelmed because of the fact that he had lost World War II.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the woman put super glue on her sun glasses? Because she stepped on them and they broke.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's worst then finding a worm in your apple Eating it.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

i found waldo.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How does a Black Guy eat chicken. Like anyother human-being.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Dog is walking through a park and is almost stepped on by a horse. Dog says, "Hey, watch where you're going!" Horse says, "Well, looky here! A talking dog!"

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why is the redneck crying? They died of diabeetus.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Whats worse than dropping your ice cream cone Your dad having brian cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you call a black man who is great at basketball? An all-star

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's yellow and shouldnt be in this country. The asian girl in my economics class

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you call a black police officer? The drug dealer's inside man.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

If a picture is worth a thousand words, what is a video worth?

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Do you know why I am excited? I don't know I'm asking you.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

speak now or forever hold your pee

thumb_up thumb_down -8

why did the cow say baaaaa ? it was a stupid cow

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's the difference between a tigar and a shark? One's a land mammal.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops