What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak.

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So I was walking down the road today

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"Lassie, Lassie, come quick! Timmy is in the well!" "I'm a dog," replies Lassie. "You folks have ropes, ladders, and opposable thumbs. What the hell could I possibly do to help?" With that final act of disobedience, Lassie was turned into fertilizer.

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There was once a man named Larry. Larry was an office worker for a paper company. One day when Larry was counting papers he got a papercut on his left hand. Therefore his finger began to bleed as he sat in agony. What did Larry do next? He got up and got a band-aid. Larry continued his paper work at his desk.

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women's rights

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Dear crush, I want to drink you

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What did the man dying of cancer want for his birthday? To live.

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Whats The difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash And one is a watermelon

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Roses are der Violets are eulb I am dyslexic

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why are black people good at sports? because i f***ed your mom

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Why did the plane leave late? Because they were out of Kellogg's® Breakfast Cereal.

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Q: What do you call an alligator in a vest? A: An investigator

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What happened when the young child fell off of the swing? He broke open his head causing him to be sent to the hospital for 3 weeks.

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Q. What's short and black A. A little black kid

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What do you call an Asian man without any clothes on? -naked

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I'm Ryan Dunn, and this is a 120 mph car crash

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Who is the best person to do your nails with? Nobody, you have no friends.

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You wanna hear a clean joke? Mary takes a bath with bubbles. Wanna hear a dirty joke? Bubbles is a man.

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what did the ox say to his son when he left for collage? bison

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What sport do all black people like? This is impossible to answer because not all black people like the same sport.

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Knock knock. Who's there? You're adopted.

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Why can't Sally use the swings? Because she has no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there?? ... Not Sally.

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A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, "I forgot to store acorns for winter and now I am dead."

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Q: what did the grandmother give to her grandson. A: a lightbulb

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops