The adventures of Helen Keller:

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Why did the man commit suicide? Because all meaning in his life were gone.

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What did Santa call the prostitute? Nothing. Santa isn't real.

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what did the dog say to the retarded black guy ? bark

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Alright alright Tifa, you look totally different from your drawn identical twin. And yeah I could have been a bit more subtle, don't you worry, I have a special knack for SPAMMING COMMENTS INTO THE ABYSS! I mean sheesh you where pretty open about it earlier, and you said you did not give a damn about what random people thought... Moral: But yeah, I can do better than that, I just do not want to, no seriously, if you are going to go feeling ashamed, then I have failed you.

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Five guys in white sheets chase a black man down the street. It is Halloween and all six people are close friends and enjoy goofing around.

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Knock Knock .....................Oh it was just the TV

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What's Mackaulay Culkin's favorite salad dressing? Neverland Ranch.

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hating his life and his job, the man leaves work early and while he is in the elavator he has thoughts about killing himself after returning to his apartment he turns on the TV and grabs his gun out of the drawer. sitting in a chair with a gun to his head he looks at the TV and realizes that his office building has just been hit by a 747 piloted by Al-Quida members. Suddenly the man realizes that maybe he has something to live for and decides not to kill himself.

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Two monkeys are lying in a tree. Big monkey and little monkey, little monkey bites the big monkey's tale, big monkey starts jumping around the place shouting. Little monkey just starts laughing and takes another sip of whiskey.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Why couldn't she get up? Because she had no legs.

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Bob: Your mama's so fat, she rolled over four quarters and made a dollar! Todd: YOur mama's so fat, here's a picture of her tied up in my basement. Todd wins the insult war.

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What do you call two gays with small dicks? Trace and Jacob

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Why is the Mexican a gardener? He has a mental disability that makes him unable to do more than a simple task.

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Yo mama so ugly everybody died. The End.

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Two Eskimos are in a bath tub. One says pass the soap. The other says no soap; radio.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Yes

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A pirate walks into a doctors office with ship's wheel attached to his crotch. Pirate: "Arrrrrr, do ya accept Kaiser Permanente?" Doctor: "Yes, but there's a $20 co-pay."

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Why bouriquet fall off the swing? Ask him.

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What is the coefficient of friction's favourite band? MU-se. What does the coefficient of friction go to see at weekends? MU-seums. What is the coefficient of friction's favourite hobby? Masturbating violently with a noose around his neck.

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Taxes are like prostitutes. The higher your salary, the more you pay.

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What do you call the birth of George Lucas? Terrible, abdominal pain for his mother.

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A kid walks into a bar and the bartender yells, "Get Out!"

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What would happen if you put avocando, pineapple, sardines, peanut butter, brussel sprouts and milk into a blender and drank it. most probabley salmonala poisoning because the sardines were off.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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