I have 13 hedge hogs in one hand and 4 pineapples in my van how many pikelets does it take to cover the roof. Purple because aliens dont wear hats.

What do you call an awesome school? St Heinrich's Law School (Teaching you to break the laws!)

How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at its face!

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She didn't.

Why don't vampires like garlic? Every vampires was raped by a garlic salesman.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Sugar is sweet, And so is she.

What's more dangerous, a big rock or a small one? It doesn't matter. You can blame my mom for having me.

A man walks into a bar and probably sustains serious head injuries and possibly a concussion as most bars are usually made out of solid metals such as iron or steel and is therefore not permitted by his doctor to engage in sports or other rigorous activities for an allotted period of time depending on the degree of his injury.

A black man is picking cotton in a southern white mans field. This is because the white man is paying a more than fair wage and the black man is a 3rd generation cotton picker who enjoys taking part in his heritage.

Why did the woman cross the road? Why the hell is she out of the kitchen!

why did the chinken cross the rode? why? to get to the gay persons house. Knock, Knock. Who's there. the chicken.

What's so funny about losing the game? Nothing.

Why did the black man fall asleep in the unemployment line? Because he was dangerously fatigued from staying up all night weeping passionately into the arms of his wife after losing his high-earning job of twenty years after the CEO of the company declared bankruptcy and finding out that his only daughter was in the hospital in critical condition after her school bus flipped off a bridge.

There is an elephant, a zebra, a lion, and a black man. The black man is enjoying his visit to the zoo.

YOUR MOMMA IS SO FAT WHEN SHE JUMPED FOR JOY........she didn't get stuck because there's nothing to get stuck in.

What do you call a man with a diploma? A high school graduate.

Why does Garrett have a small penis? He is not old enough to buy extenze.

Q: On a plane, a black man does not grab a bag of peanuts, while everyone else does. Why? A: He has allergies.

What did the kid say to Santa? Nothing, he was a goat.

It's funny that Melo and Garnett are going to be on the same Allstar team

Boston was having so much fun everyone was running and screaming

What's worse than finding an apple in your worm... I mean, a worm in your apple ? "Then I took an arrow to the knee" jokes.

What do you call 2 lesbians in a canoe? Fur traders

whats blue and looks like a bucket? a red bucket disguised as a blue bucket

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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