What did Jesus say as he walked on water and people went like WOHOO! OMG WE ARE TOTALLY GOING TO CHISEL THIS INTO JEWTUBE SO EVERYONE CAN SEE! "BEHOLD AS I WALK UPON THIS WATER WHILE ALL OF YOU HAVE FAILED BEFORE ME! ONLY I CAN WALK OF THIS WATER OF FROZEN WITHOUT SLIPPING! Nero: Because go fuck yourself asshole. Lol... Jewtube was not as widely available as youtube so yeah... Walking on ice without falling over was a big thing back then... You know such as OMG! EATING BREAD AND DRINKING WINE! WOOOOOOAAAAH SCIENCE! AND BURNING BUSHES SPOKE AND... Moral: "Ill be back, you know, just to annoy you, and because I want to, a real man needs no other reason, and that is why you fuckers need so many of them"

Why did the Grandad teabag his Grandson? Because he likes dipping his balls into the mouths of his Grandchildren; as if they were a teabag and his mouth was a mug.

Why did the gir fall off of the swing? She had no arms.

A lawyer met with his client and said.. well, there is some good news and some bad news The bad news is that you're going to prison for life.

Your mom is so poor She will soon have to make the difficult decision whether or not to put you up for adoption

Knock knock! Who's there? Bob Hi bob, come inside. And next time just use the doorbell

Austin is gay. He goes to River Road. And is a sophomore.

What do you do if you can't go to the Wednesday Night Market on Wednesday? You go on Thursday

What did Chuck Norris say when he stubbed his toe? "Oh shit I stubbed my toe."

What happened to the kid who brome his neck? He died.

A: Hi I am a Mormon B: I know I'm one of your wifes

what did luke say to darth vader? Can i borrow ur car please.

what's funnier than a dead baby in a clown costume? philanthropy

A man walks into a bar. He bumps his head on the iron and has headaches for a week.

Q: what does a worm and a fish have in common? A: they are both a worm, apart from the fish

you better accept "balls in yo mouf"...

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

What did the doctor say to the actor? Your an actor.

Q. What do you call a headless boy in a river A. A headless boy, in a river.

I'm going as the joker for halloween

What do a duck and a bike have in common? They both have handlebars, except for the duck.

Why did the 60 y/o man take erectile dysfunction pills? His doctor prescribed them.

Roses are blue Violets are buckets this poem makes no sense Washing machines

what did god say when we made his first black person oops i acidenlty burnt it

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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