Why did the kid poo his pants? Because he was Matt Daly

Why haven't any women go to the moon? Cause it still doesn't need cleaning.

Always do, always will, I have overcome far worse, doctor told my mother when I was born (without a heartbeat) that I was dead, and if they somehow managed to get me breathing again (heart beating etc) I would have suffered so much brain damage that I would not have a concious mind, in other words I would never have been able to learn anything, not to speak nor to type... ...Gotta say I pretty much fucking disagree with the "good" old doctor, and for the record, my heart is as healthy as... Healthy can be I am ambidextrous, but because of this eyedrum mutant thing of mine, I cant tell left from right, because well, to my radar senses both are left and right. Sorry if I am not making much sense here, just bleed a bit out of my nose, had it been from my ears, things could have gotten ugly, but no, its all good.

why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 was black

A horse walks into a convenience store. He grabs a pack of gum, pays the man at the counter, and walks out.

How do you starve a black man? You deny his foodstamps ~Katie&Lena&Shelbey(:

1)Did you hear about the sick juggler? 2)No... 1) He just couldn't stop throwing up!!!! 2)Oh no!! Is he ok?? 1)He's dead. 2)HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA c&h

What did the white person say to the black person? Nothing because he was black

What happens when you drive down the road? you get to the end of the road

so a girl asks a guy: "if a tree falls in the forest, and no one is around to hear it, does it make a sound?" the guy responds: "trees dont grow in the kitchen, so you shouldnt be worried about it."

Q: A football coach walks into a bank. Why? A: Because one of his players is suffering from terminal cancer and he needs governmental funding for the team to play the big game against their rivals and to win, in hopes the kid will recover. Q: Why did the football coach go into the bank again? A: To receive more money to find a new running back.

What is the best game in the world? There is no answer because that would be an opinion and opinions cannont be proved or measured.

When he was a little boy, what was Chaz Bono's favorite Cher song? Chaz Bono was never a little boy, he was a girl.

Why was the jew crying? He just found out his newborn baby had twenty minutes to live.

your mom gave me head.....phones

If Johnny has 5 apples and Susie has 7 apples, will they give them to the homeless?

why was the clown sad? because his wife left him

What is brown and sticky? A stick.

I am Asian, I've seen the color blue, but God made a mistake, Asians are taller than you.

What is the easiest method of making multiple women fall head over heels? Have a wingman help you raise a rope at the start of a women's running race.

What did the teenage girl get for her birthday? Pregnant.

Why did the little boy fall asleep? His parent pulled the plug.

Q: How do Hellen Keller's parents punish her? A: They give her a timeout

a black man walks into a shop for an interview....everyone gets afraid and hides behind there desk..when the black man wonders why they are scarred he says "I'm here for the interview"...they all tell him to leave because on his resume he put his name as john...they thought he was white....

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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