What did the duck say to the man? Nothing. Ducks cannot talk.

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Which came first, the chicken or the egg? It's a meaningless question because animals had been creating eggs for millions of years before chickens ever evolved.

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What happens when you throw a cricket bat at a blonde? She is hurt and reports you to the police for anti-social behaviour.

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Did you hear about the kidnapping yesterday? He slept for at least 3 hours.

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Why Did the baby cross the street? He was stapled to the chicken's back

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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Why was the asian boy get straight A's? He paid attention during class, took good notes, studied at home, and had a personal drive that lead him to be a good student.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a terrorist -lschles

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What do the Holocaust and baseball have in common? They are sports, except the Holocaust.

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What black and blue and red all over? My mom after my dad comes back from the bar.

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Why did Sally fall off the tree? Because Sally weighed 500 lbs and it was a bamboo tree.

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Hey Tim lets think of a joke

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Why did Benjamin Franklin go to the movies? Dim message, sapi message=InputBox("Find Out","Why did Benjamin Franklin Go To the Movies?") Set sapi=CreateObject("sapi.spvoice") sapi.Speak message

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a man walks into a bar he is an alcohol and it's ruining his family

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Chuck Norris doesn't sleep. He has insomnia.

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Why did the chiken cross the road. Anwer: because it was being chased by a crazy horny/ kinky redneck.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue I have a gun BANG!

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Why did the kitten die? Because your mom is gay.

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Freeza: I am the strongest in the universe! (if you ignore my brother Coola which is much stronger and all...) Goku: You have pissed me off now Freeza, I will now turn into a super Asian and prove to the world that real Asians are actually blonde and blue eyed! (I am sure Goku means Sayans, which is "completely different") Goku: HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARG! Freeza: Omg, he... he... is trying to take a dump! IMPOSSIBLE! I will have to find his balls and caress them... Will Goku ever take a shit? Or reach all new levels of constipation during the series? Find out in the next episode of dragon ball z!

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Why did the cookie go to the hospital? Leukemia

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My dog has no nose." "How does it smell?" "Potato"

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Your mother is so fat.... I am happy to see her join our exercise group.

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Why did the chess grandmaster lose his mind? Because he died of old age.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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