What did the girl with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Repeatedly raped by her alcoholic, child molesting father.

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Roses are red violets are blue ... Aww I just don't give a damn and nether do you.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Animal cruelty

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Good to see you today!

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A: Knock knock. B: Who's there? A: Banana! B: Not you again..(slams door)

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What happened to the boy who fell off the swing? He got hurt.

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How's your mum? she's dead..

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What did the phone say to the telephone? I can't connect with you.

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Why was the woman making a sandwhich in the kitchen? She was hungry.

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What do you call a dead blond in a closet? A homicide victim.

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What happened to the blonde that died her hair brown? Her hair turned brown.

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What did the guard say to the... I was going to finish this anti-joke but I took an arrow to the knee.

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What's worse than being gay? Dying in a gas chamber in the Holocaust.

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Q:How many doorknobs should you throw at a police man? A:None you should have upmost respect for the law.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

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your mother is so rather large that when she stepped onto a scale, it stated her exact body weight which was 280 pounds. Which come to think of it isn't that big considering that obesity is now the norm and average people are referred to as abnormal.

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What's the difference between black people and white people? Their skin color.

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What's black and white and red all over? And old fashioned television painted red.

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What cheese is not yours? The one that you didn't buy.

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Did you hear the one about the priest, the rabbi, the astronaut, the olympic diver, the mcdonald's employee, and the web designer? Neither did I...

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How do you get rid of a boomerang? There are many potential options for getting rid of your boomerang. You can choose to pass it on to somebody as a gift, make a profit through thrift stores or online auctions or perhaps sell it in a newspaper. Alternatively you may wish to simply dispose of it. The average reading speed of an American adult is 300 words per minute. This was exactly 100 words. This means that it took approximately 20 seconds to read it. This means that approximately 4 people died of cancer world wide while you read this.

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Why? Because racecar.

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Why did Sally fall of the Swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not Sally

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? 1. Discovering your "girlfriend" is a man 2. The Holocaust 3. Being Raped 4. Being Raped by a Giant Scorpion-Panda Hybrid 5. Being Raped by a Giant Scorpion-Panda Hybrid who doesn't wear protection.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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