roses are red violets are dead honey is yellow and so is head

I used to be an adventurer like you, then I took an arrow to the knee and had armor so it deflected off. Then I found out my wife was pregnant.

A sign at the drug rehab centre said keep off the grass. Jimmy thought it was a joke. So the groundskeeper chopped his legs off.

osama bin ladin is dead. let's get a beer.

Why did the Teacher cry? Because he was sad.

Boys go to college to get more knowledge, girls go to Jupiter... Actually I lied, girls go to the kitchen

Q. What do you get when you cross a man, a bear and a pig? A. ManBearPig

LUKE, I am your father... this is your mother, your parents dont love you so we've adopted you

you give like i give lomain

How many gay men does it take to screw in a light bulb? One. He was happy to do it.

What do you get when you shoot 3 cute kittens that have just walked into the house? 3 dead kittens

Why was the ginger angry with the manager of the hardware store? His smoke detector didn’t come with a snooze button.

What's black and white and eats like horse? A zebra.

womens rights

Why did it rain happiness? The people who wrote the jokes above and below this one exploded.

Dyslexia ruels!

what do you call a unicorn crossing a bridge? nothing there fake

Patient- "Doctor, doctor help me! I've only got 59 seconds to live!" Doctor- "I'll be there in a minute."

Why was Samantha crying? Because her hair got stuck in a fan.

Why did the girls ice cream melt? Because she was on fire.

Warning: Legit Joke Below What is the difference between an elevator and a Mexican? Only one can raise a child.

What did the barber say to Chewbacca? DAAAAAAYYYYUUUUMMMM!!!

Whats black and white all over? Michael Jackson

What's red and round? A red and round solid.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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