Why'd the cat have one eye? It got kicked by a goat.

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Gale swallows.

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what do you call a black man flying a plane? a pilot you racist.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing set? She had no arms.

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what is long,hard and holds semen,a submarine , i spelled seamen wrong

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What do you call a man with three testicles? Polyorchid. Look it up.

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What's worse than getting Alzheimer's? ........what am I doing here.....

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What is worse than finding a dead mouse in your loaf of bread? A lot of things since you were able to sue the bread company for tens of thousands of dollars.

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two muffins were in an oven. one muffin says, "gee, its hot in here." the other one says, "AH! A TALKING MUFFIN!"

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A crazy priest squats down and poops in the middle of the church... nobody understood what was going so they pointed and laughed.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was recently released from prison for violent crimes.

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Why was the boy sad? His friend stabbed him with a fork. Also, his mother died. Also, his dad raped him Also, he has a chode. And it really sucks when you have a chode.

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What's black and blue and red all over? A person who was just in a fight.

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Your momma's so ugly she adopted you because she had a problem attracting men.

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A guy walks into a bar and says, "Ouch!"

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If you're American when you go into the bathroom, and American when you come out, what are you inside? American! What are you, a communist?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because my first shot missed.

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Why are atheists stupid? Actually, statistically, they are more intelligent than believers.

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Two muffins are in an oven. They are then baked at 375 for about 30 minutes and then taken out to cool.

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An English man a Scotts man and an Irish man buy a helicopter between them,they go to pick it up after paying for it and realise that non of them can fly it. so they get a refund and go to the pub.

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What do you call a group of black men jumping off a building? Chocolate Rain

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A bear walks into a bar. The building is evacuated swiftly but several people are killed

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What is the difference between obama and a hobo. NOTHING

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What do you get when you cross a pelican with a mountain goat? It's hard to say.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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