If you're American when you go into the bathroom, and American when you come out, what are you inside? American! What are you, a communist?

There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

What runs faster than a nigger with a stolen tv? His brother with the remote

What did the young girl get for Christmas? Violently raped and murdered by her abusive father.

What's the difference between an orange? Mooses don't like to wear sweater-vests.

Your momma's so ugly that she was worried that she would never marry anyone.

What do you get when you cross Chuck Norris with a Cheetah? A yellow Chuck Norris with black spots.

Good to see you today!

What is the most attractive part of a woman's body? The part where she doesn't have a penis. I know, I know, the no-penis thing looks weird and strange, but hear me out. I think it's kind of cute and quirky. Like, oops, there's something that's supposed to be there, but isn't.

What's the difference between a Jew and a Pizza? A Jew is a person either born into or converted to Judaism, and a Pizza is a disc shaped, oven baked bread typically topped with tomato sauce and cheese.

Why did the deaf man go to the concert? He had recently acquired a brand new hearing aid which meant that he was able to hear much better and decided that he wanted to listen to some music.

womens sports...

why didnt the chicken cross the road? he did cross the road

Whats red and cant fly a plane. An apple.

John had 32 candy bars. He ate 28 of them. What does John have now? daibetes, john has diabetes.

what do you call a homosexual kid? A Kerich

Why was the boy sad? His friend stabbed him with a fork. Also, his mother died. Also, his dad raped him Also, he has a chode. And it really sucks when you have a chode.

i'm a loser with body odor.. plus i play pokemon to pass the time because reality is just to horrible to face. guess who? josh wood.

The night is always darkest just before the dawn. Just kidding I'm Helen Keller, everything's always dark.

How do wake up Lady Gaga You Poker her face

It's raining, it's pouring The old man is snoring He went to bed, he bumped his head Got a brain hemorrhage and died in his sleep.

Why did the Mexican cross the road? Because he wanted to get to the other side.

What is the similarety between a car and a banana? Both starts with B

What is pink and smells like green paint? Pink paint

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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