Q: What is hard and long on a man? A: His wife's funeral

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Ice cream You scream We all scream Because there is a murderer killing our friends

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whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff

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A blonde walks into a salon and says "I would like to get my golden locks trimmed." The haircutter replies "surely, just sit yourself down in that chair over there and I'll be with you momentarily." The blonde walks to the chair and sits down. When the haircutter comes over he asks her, "would you please remove your headset, I can't cut your hair while they're on." She laughs at her forgetfulness and removes them obligingly.

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Q: Why did the bully hit the kid A:Because he is a bully-I thought that would have been self explanitory.

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What did the idiot call his pet zebra? Charlie. The fact that the man is an idiot is irrelevant.

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What's the difference between black people and white people? Their skin color.

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Someone else's cheese.

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nick toth

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What's black and blue and red all over? A person who was just in a fight.

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Little Johnny asks his father how babies are made. So the father rapes him from behind.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because my first shot missed.

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Knock Knock Who's There? I am. I am who? I think someone has contracted amnesia.

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What made parashoot paint's so uncool? MC Hammer.

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A man walked into a bar. What did he say? Ouch.

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What did the penguins get for Christmas? A hang-glider What did the polar bears get for Christmas? Death, The Holocaust, Global Warming, and all of Steven King's books.

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If Barbie is so popular...why do you have to buy her friends?

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There was a Priest, a Rabbi, and a Gay Man on a plane. The plane was going down. The Priest said "amen". The Rabbi said "amein". The Gay Man put his penis in the rabbi's asshole.

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Whats better than pizza? Pepperoni pizza, if you like pepperoni that is.

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My Roomate-(crying in the fetal position for the love of his life has been murderer) Me- (laughing) I have a problem

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What's black, white,and red all over? A crime scene where a black and white man were brutally murdered by a psychopath that is still on the loose and could be killing someone else.

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Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange. Aren't You Glad I Didn't Say Cliterus?

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How do you fit 1,000 Jews in a Volkswagen? Trick question, you can't.

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whats annoying and black? black people

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops