Q: Why did the bully hit the kid A:Because he is a bully-I thought that would have been self explanitory.

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you momas so fat, you momas so ugly Your mother's breasts sag with such severity that the late great Salvador Dali mistook them for cloth.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To escape the overwhelming feeling of self doubt created by an abusive drug addicted father which has left him seeking life threatening situations that should never befall a simple chicken.

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what does a jew want most for hanukkah? presents

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On a scale of one to 10, F*ck yourself.

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Knock Knock Who's there? me oh

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Your momma's so ugly she adopted you because she had a problem attracting men.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? 1. Discovering your "girlfriend" is a man 2. The Holocaust 3. Being Raped 4. Being Raped by a Giant Scorpion-Panda Hybrid 5. Being Raped by a Giant Scorpion-Panda Hybrid who doesn't wear protection.

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A bear walks into a bar. The building is evacuated swiftly but several people are killed

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Two muffins are in an oven. One says "It's getting hot in here". The other one starts to reply but then it's internal organs burst from the heat.

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whats the hardest part of roller skating. Telling your dad that you are gay.

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What did the grass say to the human "Hey" The human then screams and runs to safety

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A guy walks into a bar, he has a few drinks than leaves.

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Why did the old woman put roller skates on her rocking chair? She had dementia.

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How many jews can get in a Volvo? 5.

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A Priest, a Rabbi, and Santa Claus are on a plane. This is impossible because Santa Claus does not exist.

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what is long,hard and holds semen,a submarine , i spelled seamen wrong

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I need somebody to lean on... ...Because one of my legs was amputated after I was blown up on a mine field in afganistan.

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knock! knock! who's there? mom mom who? your mom... your girlfriend just died in a car accident while carrying you baby...

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Q: What is hard and long on a man? A: His wife's funeral

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what did the atheist get for Christmas? Nothing. If he was being truly honest to his beliefs, he wouldn't partake in a christian holiday.

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pedophile

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What's green and has wheels? A cucumber with wheels.

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Why was the boy sad? His friend stabbed him with a fork. Also, his mother died. Also, his dad raped him Also, he has a chode. And it really sucks when you have a chode.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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