Your carpol will be here soon! What a pool for cars is coming?

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What cheese is not yours? The one that you didn't buy.

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Q: What happens when your name is Gretchen Weiner? A: You can never make "fetch" happen.

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I hope you take your own wise words to heart Nero, how would you like to claim to be me and get our ship somewhat on land before it all goes to pieces? After all I have been claiming to be you for a long long time.

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My dog has no nose." "How does it smell?" "Potato"

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Where do bananas come from? Mexico

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What was the Alzheimer patient favorite drink? What was the Alzheimer patient favorite drink?

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

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How Long is a Chinese name.

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Women's rights.

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Yo Mama is so stupid, she was riding her bike down the street when she was distracted and rode off a cliff. Oh crap I am so sorry.

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Three nuns walk into a bar. They realize they are in a place they don't want to be, so they leave, casting furtive glances around, fearing that someone from their congregation will see them and think they went in to drink.

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What did the doctor say to the Lawyer? I get paid more

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The NBA lockout

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What came first, the chicken or the egg? Neither. The single celled amoeba. As billions of years passed, the simple amoeba began to form limbs which it utilized to crawl its way out of the ocean onto dry land. Millions of years would pass before the simplified organism began to develop into a fully functional chicken.

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Knock Knock. who's there? It's me. you need to be specific...

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Women's Rights

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Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

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How do you stop a clown from smiling? Hit him in the face with an axe.

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You just threw a fireman and a baby out of a skyscraper... who arrived earth first? Adam and Eve. Moral: Because theology is bullshit.

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What did the muffin say to the other muffin? "Hello, nice to meet you."

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Did you hear about the kid napping? They found his body in a ditch.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To escape the overwhelming feeling of self doubt created by an abusive drug addicted father which has left him seeking life threatening situations that should never befall a simple chicken.

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There are 3 type of people in the world. People who can count, and people who can't.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops