Billy: Hey hey hey!!!!! wanna hear a dirty joke? Joe: Sure Billy: A pig fell in the mud

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do you call an African American witch doctor dressed in ceremonial robes flying a plane? A Pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How many babies does it take to change a light bulb? None. Babies shouldn't be changing light bulbs.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Roses are flowers.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

who sells coke and ruins lives? Vagina Parker

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Are you made out of silicon, because you are silly and your name is Con.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Knock,knock Who's there? Apple Apple who? Knock,knock Who's there? Apple Apple who? Knock, knock Who's there? Lemon Lemon who? Lemon know if you want me to say apple again

thumb_up thumb_down -15

why can't Amy ride on the rollercoaster? Because she's under the height limit.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

-What did George Clooney say to Jennifer Lawrence? -"Hi!"

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? She was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Guy walks into a bar and orders a drink. He goes to the restroom and urinates. He comes back and orders another drink. He goes to the restroom again and urinates. He comes back and orders another drink. Guess what happens next? A. He goes to the restroom to urinate B. He buys another drink C. He flirts with a very attractive lady D. Goes home and masturbates

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What's Black,White and red all over? A black person with a skin disease on her period.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What's the difference between a cow and some dirt? They're the same except for almost everything

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What did the fish say when he swam into the wall? DAM!

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What's the difference between a pheromone and a hormone? Hormones are secreted internally and trigger various biochemical pathways that cause certain effects. We all are familiar with the effects of testosterone and estrogen, both on the anatomy, and behaviour of humans. Pheromones are secreted externally, and have an effect on another creature in similar ways. Usually they have to do with attracting sexual partners or changing a sex partners behaviour or body in some way.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Your mom is so ugly that she had self-esteem problems and severe depression as a teenager due to merciless bullying due to her looks, however she overcame this, found a man who loved her for who she was, and then married him. She now lives a happy life.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

"Hello, is this the Krusty Krab?" "No, this is Patrick."

thumb_up thumb_down -15

How do you keep an idiot busy? Give him something to do.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Your momma's so fat, she died on the operating table during her bypass surgery.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Your mother is so ugly that I removed her from my friends list on Facebook.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A man serves his wife dinner. She laughes and tells him it tastes funny. He then procedes to tell her that is because he put large amounts of poision into the food.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? - "Where's my tractor?"

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A redundant man walked into a bar. He sat down, and unfortunately, we learn 5 minutes later that his wife died.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What do you call a hamburger with nothing inside of it? A virgin.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops