Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to KFC and join his chicken friends to protest.

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Where does a one-legged waitress work? Wherever she can get good health insurance.

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Q:What do you find in the middle of a pile of dead babies? A:Another dead baby!

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Guest: "Why does your dog sit there and watch me eat?" Hotel Host: "I can't imagine, unless it's because you have the plate he usually eats from."

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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I can't submit this joke because I got the captcha wrong

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why did the chinese man die because someone shot him

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What did one friend say on his friend's myspace page? You need a Facebook

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Whats funnier then a dead baby? A lot of things.

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Friends are like trees, if you deprive them from water they'll die.

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What do a squirrel and a cigarette have in common? -They are both perfectly harmless until you stick them in your mouth and light them on fire.

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How does Lady Gaga like her meat? As a dress.

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what do you call a prostitute with AIDS? Most likely her first name, unless of course you know her and it is normal for you to refer to her by a nickname or some shorter version of her proper first name.

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Deja moo: The feeling you've heard this bull before.

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Doctor, everybody despises me. That cant be totally true you despicable piece of shite!

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Woman: do u want to watch Snakes on a Plane? Man: sure, what is it about? Woman: It's about a horse on a boat

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Where did the farmer take his pigs on Saturday afternoon? the Slaughterhouse

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what did the man do when he was at the end of his rope? he bought more rope.

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Get Outta Here We're Closed!

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If life gives you melons, you have dyslexia.

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Caitlin Jenner has a mangina.

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Obama walks into a hospital....

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If you are swimming in a tree how many dogs does it take to crack a duck? The answer is 4 because nothing rhymes with orange

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What is the difference between a person of Mexican heritage and a park bench? One is a bench, the other is a human being.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops