What do you call a deer with no eyes? Animal cruelty

What is the most attractive part of a woman's body? The part where she doesn't have a penis. I know, I know, the no-penis thing looks weird and strange, but hear me out. I think it's kind of cute and quirky. Like, oops, there's something that's supposed to be there, but isn't.

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

A priest and a bunch of boys are in a room. They are having choir practice.

What do you a a toilet with fecal matter in it? A toilet.

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was a woman.

The meme walks out of the bar.

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Cheese.

Q:How many doorknobs should you throw at a police man? A:None you should have upmost respect for the law.

What's worse than being gay? Dying in a gas chamber in the Holocaust.

Chikin nuggets

What do you call an animal who is purple and feeds on grass? Well his name is Timmy, he is a 6 year old boy and has been diagnosed with a rare deadly disease that turns his skin purple and has removed him so far from reality that he has begin to feed on his front lawn.

What did the small baby faucet say to the daddy faucet? Nothing, they are inanimate objects and cannot talk.

What's worse than getting Alzheimer's? ........what am I doing here.....

John had 32 candy bars. He ate 28 of them. What does John have now? daibetes, john has diabetes.

What do snowmen eat for lunch? Snowmen don't eat, they're inanimate balls of of solid precipitation with rocks for smiles and eyes and carrots for noses.

How much does a polar bear weigh? Around a thousand pounds.

Why can't Jay cut his hair? Because he has AIDS

why does king kong so fat? because he eats to much

whats white and smells like black paint? nothing, white paint even though it is still paint has a slightly different smell due to the difference in dye colors used to make it

You walk in to your room. 7 chickens on your bed.

What is the difference between muffins and cornbread? I don't enjoy sticking cornbread in my anus.

What can be any colour and is made of leather? Cars. I lied about the leather part.

The Holocaust

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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