What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the middle of the oceon? Dead in the water.

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yo mama so fat that she should be concerned because diabetes is a serious issue

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Why did the baby cross the road? cause it was stapled to the chicken.

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What's pink and smells like chicken? A pink hair band, I was lying about the chicken part.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? He said, "Where's my tractor?"

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was a woman.

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Q:How many doorknobs should you throw at a police man? A:None you should have upmost respect for the law.

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Sarah Palin

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how long does it take for a black woman to poop? depending on what she ate, about 5 to 10 minutes

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -.......

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Q: why did Helen Keller's dog kill himself? A: Because he couldn't stand to see his owner suffer through blindness and deafness and being the butt of hundreds of offensive and hurtful jokes.

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What did the idiot call his pet zebra? Charlie. The fact that the man is an idiot is irrelevant.

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Why was school cancelled? Because the school was bombed.

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Dick Chaney

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Q: What is a African man with funny clothing and children straddling onto his back for dear life/ screaming in fear who only a few minutes ago before a particular incident made several young children cry and being chased by an authority figure? A: An intentionally inane circus performer partcipating in a scintillating rendition alongside his two children of who inadvertently frightened a small group of youth before he immediately decided to proceed by, during one of his extremely long, albeit few breaks, taking the members of his family on an interesting excursion to the nearby amusement park for occassional thrills. On the initial journey there, the black man, out of haste, accidentally dropped one of his children's most valuable toys of which elicited undeniably obnoxious bouts of sadness to come bursting out of his children's respective chests and an increased rate-of-travel for his wife of who accopanied him on his adventure and desired to assist him in his panic. In the spin of events, the man experienced an instance of hyper-activedness and spun out of control for a minute before eventually cooling down. Hence the screaming.

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Jesus

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acuna

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What's white and sticky? A white stick.

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If you're American when you go into the bathroom, and American when you come out, what are you inside? American! What are you, a communist?

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how do you make a joke act like yourself

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what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

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Do you know what's fun about having sex with twenty-seven year-olds? There are twenty of them.

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What did the young girl get for Christmas? Violently raped and murdered by her abusive father.

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56

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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