you: have you seen the movie constapated them:no you:its because it hasen't come out yet

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Stat1st1cs sh0w 0ne 1n f1ve pe0ple d0n't understand b1nary

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When life gives you lemonade, give life lemons and it'll be like WTF?!

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Sprechen zie deutsche? nein!

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the wild black man is searching for food. He spots a KFC, and goes wild. He then proceeds to get in line.

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Your muma is so ugly she went to a ugly competition and got kicked out "no pros aloud".

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm gonna screw you and you don't have a clue !

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Knock knock. Who's there? Screw! Screw who? Screw you.

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When life gives you lemons.... Don't eat them, because you're probable hallucinating, and you don't know where they came from.

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Goodbye to the people who hated on me.

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How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

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I also wanted to write a joke but I forgot it so here I am. Minecraft rocks and everyone who says otherwise is a noob

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Fun Fact: If humans stood in a single file line around the equator, most of them would drown.

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A black man is driving a nice car when he's suddenly pulled over by the police. "Do you know why I pulled you over?" asks the cop. "No officer" replies the black man. "You have a taillight out. However I'm going to just let you off with a warning because you seem like an upstanding citizen. Have a nice day."

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100 chefs walk into a bar

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What happens when Terran Hansen has sex with a cow? Jesse Z.

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how do you get a clown off a swing i dont know but dont call suzy

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Sickman Fraud, cocaine snorting alshole... "Oh yeah mommy I love raping you so much... What where are you? This cocaine is really bad quality man! The effect was so short..." Your friendly r*pist neighborhood Moral Man: "Because since when do you really need cocaine... ...In order to rape your mother?"

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No one walks into a bar The bar is slowly losing business and will soon be forclosed upon and will also lose his home as a result causing his family and himself to be homeless and slowly suffer on the streets

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Roses are Tits Violets are Tits I love Tits TITS!

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Where do farmers retire their used farm equipment? The tree in their backyard.

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what is the biggest lie in the whole world? -please drink responsibly

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So a man is in a car smoking weed when he forgets to crack a window so he over doses and dies. The car crashes and he kills 3 other people.

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My uncle was involved in 9/11... He called me before the plane crashed into the twin towers, his final words were so comforting... "ALLAH AKBAR!!!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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