Why did the cupcake walk into the bar? It can't it's a cupcake

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Getting up, the 2nd hardest thing in the morning.

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Jane: The house is supposedly worth $ 6 million Jack: No way! The figure is made up.

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How do you kill a pirate? Throw him of a bridge

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Justin Bieber.

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Yo mommas so fat that when people look at her they say things like "shes bigger than me"

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What did a pornstar say when she heard hard banging from the front door? Come inside.

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Why did Hayden Bryant walk down the street? Because he can, dont doubt Hayden Bryant.

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Why can't Johnny ride a bike? Because Johnny is a potato.

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what is worse than falling off a bridge? .. getting pushed off a bridge

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I like my women like I like my coffee... 2 cream 1 sugar.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I don't know how to rhyme Refrigerator ------------

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Q: How to make a man who suffers from hypochondria want to kill himself? A: You take a shet on his face.

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Q: Wy did the Araib cross the road? A: To open another gas station.

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A man serves his wife dinner. She laughes and tells him it tastes funny. He then procedes to tell her that is because he put large amounts of poision into the food.

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Yo momma is so fat, that when I went over to your house and accidentally stepped on a skateboard, yo momma came out and said "get the %$^# off the skateboard!"

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01101110 01101001 01101110 01100101 00100000 01100101 01101100 01100101 01110110 01100101 01101110 translate here http://binarytranslator.com/

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Yo mamas so greasy that she has a beard

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Remember Y2K? That could have been bad.

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If I had a nickel for every time I heard that... I'd most likely have no money as I would spend it all on cocaine.

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After six days in prison, and the eight hours in court straight they finally randomly decided that I "acted in self defense" which I did, so I demanded recompensation for they locking me up and wasting my time... ...And hell if I did not get 12.000USD for it, not before they called me disrespectful and immoral, before I shut them the fuck up... ...""Earning" your respect wont pay my bills, while I am apparently the only one with balls here, what else can you say when you everybody else shuts the fuck up and sits down because the "alpha male" of your pack, yes you a grotesquely fat ass in a black dress and a gray womans wig smacks his little hammer on his desk... Judge my ass" Speaking of morals... "It is called sacrasm furfags" Nero: Did I mention that her boyfriend broke four fingers on his hand against my chest (supposedly it was a punch of some sort), then he countered my attack(?), as he skillfuly blocked both kicks with his face, as he fell down cried and pissed himself like the 52 year old "adult" he is? Then I broke both his knees with my heels and told him I would kill him too if he told the cops that I did so in self defense... In self defense of course... Drugs told my mother I was Satan, and that I would end up killing her the very day I was born... Little did I know back then, that whatever kind of angel dust she used then was right about me killing her... Now its her turn to climb up from the hell she sent me trough, except that I locked the gate at the end. I miss my real arm though, which she chopped right off me when I was six and offered it to God as tribute, then proceeded to beat the shit out of me with it it... That kinda felt nice compared to waterboarding and all the other shit she did to me, as for my father... Tried to break my neck because I was at my room studying when he caught me scratching my prosphetic arm which was a sin apparently, yes reader I literally killed my father too and you dont hear me whining about it. Nero: I had a custom prosphetic arm made, it wont pick up or hold shit, you can in fact crush your own fathers skull with a fist literally made of steel, even if you still cant believe its not real butter. Solvemedia: Politically correct, thumbs the fucks ups for the irony... Or the steel which I used in pure fear as my neck snapped and my legs went numb... Just a literal pain in the neck for the rest of my life though, and a nice memory...

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Why did I write this joke Because I'm board as hell

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How many Spanish people does it take to screw in a light bulb? Uno

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What do men like most of all? Let's not lie, BOOBIES!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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