How do you get your dog to stop barking? You snap its neck.

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Whats similar about an elephant and a plum? Theyre both gray, except for the plum

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Why were the black mans hands all sticky? He was helping orphans with arts and crafts

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A Jew and a Muslim walk into a bar. They end up getting into a heated argument. After about an hour of back and forth they decide that each person has a valid point, agree to disagree, and go about there business.

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If Johnny has 4 dollars and Clarissa has 7 dollars, how many dollars do they have all together? 11 dollars Knock knock Who's There? Johnny Johnny who? Johnny and Clarrisa, all together we have 11 dollars.

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whats harder than nailing a dead baby to a tree? my dick wile i do it

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A man walks into a bar He goes to drink away the fact that alcoholism is tearing his family apart and that he lost custody of his three-year-old son that same day

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An Asian man man couldn't find his family, he is deeply concerned and contacts the missing persons unit.

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tuna fish dolphins sharks idk

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Why did Sally cry at the wedding? somebody shot her future husband.

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Why was the boy late for class? He was late because he got stabbed and left in the bathroom.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was depressed for a long time and decided to end his life by getting hit by a car.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Why did the man with brain cancer die? He drove his Segway off a cliff.

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Yo momma so fat she's obese.

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The man was allergic to water. He unfortunately died because water is needed to sustain health as a human.

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Whats black and yellow and makes you laugh? A bus full of niggers driving of a cliff

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Due to the wildlife conservation program prevalent in the neighborhood, the chicken was able to cross the road safely.

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What do you do when life throws lemons at you? Take out your lemon shield and retreat deep into your lemon proof bunker.

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why did the chicken cross the road who's there and the man died of cancer congradulations! your preganant

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What do you get when you mix a ginger with gasoline? a forest fire.

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A) why did the black guy leave the bar B) cause he was tired and wanted to go home

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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How do you kill a fat guy Keep giving him food he'll die eventually.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops