Why cant jonny walk? He has no legs.

A old man walks into a hospital He doesn't come back out

Why did the chicken cross the road? I'm not sure, but the farmer must be very upset about the loss of one of his chickens.

What's worse than giong to Hell? Nothing. Hell is as bad as it gets.

The man that loved birds so much that he played golf just to get a birdie.

A black guy and a white guy are in a drug store. Who buys the drugs? The customers.

Whats worse than getting raped by jack the ripper? Getting fingered by captain hook.

A man travels to the park, and kills a person, throws them in a bag and runs away. He then travels to the grocery store, kills 2 people, throws them in a bag and walks away. He then travels to the gas station, kills 3 people and walks away. He keeps traveling around killing people until he has claimed 69 victims in all. From this, we can infer that he was a psychotic murderer with a perverted sense of humor.

why do woman love the twilight books? i have no idea woman can't read

What did the hat say to the scarf? Nothing.

Liar liar, your dead nans carcass is on fire.

Where did Officer Blackman find the missing child? A shallow grave.

Q: What is the proper name for a female dog? A: Well there could be several names it could be a name on the collar in which case please look for the number so it can be returned to its owner. Another possibility is that it is a stray which you should either run for it could have a disease and you should just forget about the name then or take it in as your own and name it.

What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Batmobile? Robin get in the Batmobile.

A man walk into a bar he buys a few drinks. When he is done the bar tender gives him his check. Man told the bar tender he has no money to pay for it. Bartender says," ok how about this we have a horse in the back that hasn't laughed a day in his life if you can make him laugh you get the drinks for free." so man proceeds to do so. A few minutes later man comes out horse is dying. So the man gets his drink for free. A few days later man comes back with the same deal. So the bartender tells him" that horse hasn't stopped laughing since you went back there. If you can make him stop you get your drinks for free." Man goes in a few minutes later comes out horse is crying. Man man is remarked by how he did it but he doesn't question it. A few days past the man comes back an the horse is still crying...... So the bartender ask the man how he did..... Man says," first I told him I had a bigger dick then him....second time I proved it"

yo mamma's so fat she's fat!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

roses are red, violets are blue when ever l flush the toilet i think of you

What did the Mexican say to the Pirate? Hi, Steve!

Ask me if I'm a tree I don't need to, because I know you're not a tree

who's yellow , and looks like a bear? pudsey

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the chipmunk fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey.

3 Blondes walk into a bar. One ducks, the other two are hospitalized with mild concussions

What word starts with "N" and ends with "R" that you never want to call a black person? Nagger

What's long, brown, and in the toilet? The chocolate bar I just threw in the toilet.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...