Why was there a red chicken? He tried crossing the road.

A horse shits himself SHITLESS!

Why was the tree sad? Trees cannot think or move, and thus cannot feel emotions.

speak now or forever hold your pee

What do you get when you mix a burrito and an earthworm? Diaherea

A Blonde Goes On "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire"

I wonder if God looks at the Earth all these years later and thinks, Man, I really went overboard with the water, didn't I?

What do you call a dog that can't pass an Algebra test? A dog.

A fish swims up your penis...

Why did the man throw his son out the window? His house was on fire

Nothing. He made it home safely.

69

Why did the little boy want to sleep with his parents in their bed on the only night in weeks they'd planned to have sex? His bedroom was on fire.

what do you give a little girl with no legs and no arms for christmas...................cancer

An African american man fell out of a boat at sea. He swam back to the boat.

A man tells a blonde "you are what you eat" and she replies "well, i don't think I've eaten any sexy beasts today.'

Ask me if I'm wearing pants. Are you wearing pants? Yeah.

Q: How many babies does it take to paint a room? A: Depends on how hard you can throw.

What's green and looks like a red truck? A green truck.

Friends are a lot like trees... ...they fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

Two penguins are in the shower. One of them asks if he can have the soap. The other responds, "What am I, a telephone?"

What worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into an apple and finding 2 worms

When life gives you lemons.............. take them free stuff is awesome.

What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs because disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion).

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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