Hey diddle diddle, the cat and the fiddle, the cow jumped over the salamander, macaroni and cheese

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient ability. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

what is green and has wheels grass i lied about the wheels

How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen do? Enough to kill two and a half men

Did you hear about the pirate movie? It was rated PG-13 for sexual content/nudity, language, and some violence.

What did the kid with no arms or legs get for christmas? A bike.

Man 1: Not to be gay or anything, but I really like your shirt, it looks nice on you. Man 2: Not to be gay or anything, but I like men.

A lysdexic man tries to spell rentally metarded.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream cone? Because he got hit by a bus.

If you rewind Gozilla, it's about a giant lizard that helps rebuild a burnig city, and then goes back into the ocean again...

Lol... (wow you made me type lol), "like it is nothing to be ashamed of?" Your eyes are really beautiful, honestly probably the most beautiful eyes I have seen... And no, I am not talking about your bewbs.

Guess what? You guessed it.

Who invented apple? God

its funny cuz i laughed!

Roses are red Violets are blue I have alzheimers Who the hell are you?

What's funnier than 9/11? Nothing. 9/11 wasn't funny. It was a terrible tragedy, the most tragic in U.S. history. If you think that is funny you are a sick person. By: Logan in South Dakota

Why did they black straight guy go into an all white gay bar....? Because he went to the wrong place.

What is the difference between a baby and a tree? Its not illegal to hit one with an axe

Why couldn't the Asian couple have a white baby? Because two Wongs were mixed up in the paperwork so as a result the other Wong family ended up getting the child.

What happens when 2 gay men rub their penises together Jello

Whats worse than a bee sting? 2 bee stings Whats worse than 2 bee stings? A car crash Whats worse than a car crash? 3 bee stings

Sometimes I sit in the bath and pretend im a bubble

How will Jesse die? His mom doesnt have any food left (or money) so she eats him, and then jesse's fat little brother farts on his obese corpse

bronson watt walks into a bar.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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