q; whats small and high pitched a; rory johnston

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HOLY SHIT!!!!

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What is black and white and red all over? A half eaten zebra carcass.

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Q: What did the Black Man say to the Mexican Fellow Guy? A: Hello.

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You know why Michael J. Fox makes really good milkshakes? ... because he uses the best ingredients

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Whats brown and can't ride a bike? A lampshade.

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What do you call something thats mostly made of wood, big, round and stupid A retarded version of the Knights of the round table

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What happens when you take a break from reality? Nothing, it's impossible, unless you live in a virtual world.

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What did the horse get for Christmas? Starvation and neglect because its owner has been dead for three months of old age and he was a raging, angry, achoholic so no one cared if hey was dead and/or bothered to see if he was alive

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How do you get rid of black elephants? Arrest it for being black.

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why was the apple on the ground? because it fell

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Why was the black man kicked out of the restaurant? Blatant racism was still very prevalent at that time and place.

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why cant fat people walk because they are fat

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a man walks into a bar, it hurt.

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What did the racist white guy say to the black guy? "I don't like Asians."

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What do you call a naked couple? Horny.

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A man walked into a bar. Ouch.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm an expert on flowers.

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An Englishman, a Frenchman, and a Viking are all fighting over a piece of land. The piece of land was the whole of England and this was the beginning of the Noman conquest in 1066.

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Q: What did the clown say when he got in a car accident? A: Nothing. He died.

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How do you kill a turtle? You can't, it has a shell for a reason.

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A man walks into a Norfolk pub. The landlord (not being very worldly) notices he is of Middle Eastern descent and asks "are you Bin Laden"? To this the man replies "No I bin Swaffham". (Needs to be said in Norfolk accent)

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Q. What has four legs, but can't walk? A. A dog dying of a serious illness...

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A black man, a white man, and an Asian man walk into a bar. The black man says, "My wife died in a terrible book-keeping accident.". The white man says, "My wife died in a terrible lightbulb-sorting accident.". The Asian says, "My wife died in a terrible geography accident.". Soon after, the bar was hit by a missile, promptly killing the three men.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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