You might be a redneck if you're from a rural area and behave as such.

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what's gay as AIDS? The way you got it

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It's Christmas in Iraq. Merry Christmas

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Why a man without hands and without legs want to stay in a barrel? He actually doesn't, but is unable to get out of it.

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Whats slower than molasses? A dead baby.

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why was the little girl crying? because i raped her.

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What's got eight legs and one eye? Two chairs and half a pigs head.

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What does a scouter say about his power level? It's over 9'000!!!!!!!!!

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Why do Vampires drink your blood? Because the movie maker needed a story

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what did the girl say when she lost her shoe where is my shoe

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Why couldnt the car move? It got blown up by a tank.

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BIble verses: (secret bible code breaker edition) 90.01: Might thy level of power rise above the scouter of Vegebles 3.14: Thy shall make use of pee 6:9 Oral interaction is good for thee. 9:6: Peter said, lordeth this is no good, then the lordet said, try 6:9 and all was good. 6.66 Calleth upon this number on thy cell to speak with the beast. 9:11 This number shall aid you when in danger if thy have a cell, but not against the fallen by and Al Caida. 8:00 Call upon thy cellphone at no cost. 5.99 Thy use of plays of station three, areth too expensive... Whoops! Amen and RIIIIIIIIIIDGE RACER! 50:50 Thy shall share equally. 6:19: Thy shall use thy wrestling moves well. 20:00 Thy shall noth uset this windows version as it sucketh.' 88:88 Thy shall create four equal snowmen for me. 12.34 Read this and thy shall learn to count til four. 7:77 The number of the luck. X:B0X: It sucketh hard. 3:60 it sucketh far more than the original 9:99 Is the number to defeateth the beast while he is resting upside down 0:13 "and samuel said, but oh lord, I am a teen now!" And the lord agreed and all was good. Ok, I got to decode my bible further, yes indeed!

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Hey Jake can I use your lawnmower? Why Michael, so you can run over my cat like you did last night

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what happens when a hamster bites your arm? your arm bleeds

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How many Jews can you fit inside a car? Legally somewhere between 2 and 9 depending on seat belt availability and passenger space.

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What's purple and green and has a criminal record including two counts of armed robbery, five counts of possession with intent to sell, one count of attempted murder, several citations for underage drinking, and a parking ticket? Barney, but ignore all that other stuff. His record was expunged.

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Two muffins are in an oven. They procede to bake at 325 degrees for thirty minutes.

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Why did the black man quit his job as a rapper? Because he was an admirable father and husband and was willing to sacrifice his passion to provide for those he loved.

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What's black, white & red all over? A cow in a slaughter house.

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why did jimmy stop eating his breakfast two Penn state officials knocked at the door

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They don't call it Bangkok for nothing.

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dylan wishes life was like cod. that way he would actually be able to do something cool

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: You were adopted.

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whats worse than the holocaust? nothing

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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