Juan got hit by a truck Knock Knock Who's there? Juan's brother coming to stab you in the abdomen.

why wasn't the boy at his moms funeral? He killed his mom.

My brother and I laugh at how competitive we used to be. But I laugh harder

Chuck Norris has normal human strength.

so you're waling through the desert and a tire falls off your canoe. How many pancakes does it take to shingle a doghouse?

BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH

A Jew and a Muslim are playing golf. Just not together.

Whats the difference between a bong and a nigger? My bong works

A boy with one arm walks into a rock climbing facility and quickly realizes that his dream of being a rock climber is impossible because he is blind.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimers Roses are red

I may have Alzheimer's, but at least I don't have Alzheimer's.

You know what happens when you assume? You make a judgment based on incomplete information.

What did the boy with no arms and no legs, who got cancer for Christmas, get for his Birthday? Nothing, he didn't live that long.

Why did the man fall on the floor? He had a heart attack.

Why did Susie fall out the swing, Because I hate disabled people and i pushed her

I've never seen your mother, so I won't make any vile suggestions concerning her weight.

how do you stop a rhino from charging? you shoot it with a gun until it's either dead or no longer charging at you because thats a highly dangerous situation.

I scream. You scream. We all scream and huddle in a corner of our first grade classroom because of a masked gunman.

A man walks into a bar, and sees another man with a huge orange head. He asks the bartender, "Do you know why that man has such a huge orange head?" The bartender replies: I dont know, maybe if you buy him a drink he'll tell you. So that man walks over to the man with a huge orange head and buys him a drink. He says to him: Excuse me, sir but why do you have a big orange head? The man with the big orange head replies: Well, one day I was walking along the beach and I found an interesting bottle. So I opened it and out popped a genie. He told me I had three wishes. The first thing I asked for was to have all the money that I wanted, and the means to get more. Suddenly, My pockets were overflowing with cash. So then I wished for the most beautiful, perfect woman ever created and there she appeared in front of me, and we immediately fell in love. The third thing I asked for was a huge orange head.

A smart kid just answered a question in class, a blonde girl then says "Nerd, your always answering all the questions". The teacher then says "Hey thats not nice, he could be your boss one day." The smart kid quickly replies "Highly unlikely, i do not plan on being a pimp when i grow up".

What do you call two black men walking down a stairwell? Their names.

Nina and Harry sitting in a tree K-I-S-S-I-N-G, first comes love, then comes marriage, then comes divorce because their marriage didn't turn out right and Harry hit Nina in the head with a iron...

An american, a brit and a mexican are on a plane. The brit throws out a bag of tea, explaining to the confused others: "We have so much tea in England we can just throw it out!". The mexican proceeds by throwing a bag of peppers out, explaining "We have so much peppers in Mexico, we can just throw it out!". The american proceeds to throw the mexican out of the plane. "Why did you do that?!" exclaimed the brit. The american turned around. "He killed my wife."

A man goes to the doctor's office. The doctor says, "I have some bad news, and some worse news. The bad news is you have alzheimer's. The worse news is you have cancer." The man breaks down in tears.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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