Why do women wear makeup and perfume? Because they're ugly and they smell bad.

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Why was little Jessica missing?? She was stuck in the freezer.

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What was the strangest part about meeting a girl called Suzie? She had arms.

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How many light bulbs does it take to garner an unnecessarily large crowd of a single ethnic group of people working together to simultaneously replace said light bulbs and uphold their cultural stereotypes? What the hell's a light bulb? I'm a culturally illiterate Amish man.

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Don't quote me on this Nero, but she kinda deserves it, she should know better, its not like you have gotten this far by not knowing your limits, even if you tend to break them way too often. Can you get rid of the hallucinations with your mind alone? If not get to sleep asap! And stay asleep for a month or so, and if they somehow cant feed your system intravenously, they can all get the fuck out of there.

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Q. How many trees does it take to change a light bulb? A. Trees can't change light bulbs.

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What's Jewish and gay? Henry Shine

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wsde

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Q: What do you call a dog driving a car? A: A dog driving a car.

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Why didn't the man tip his waitress? Because he's a cheap bastard.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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What's black and breaks your stove when falling from a tree? Your stove

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? The holocaust What's worse than the holocaust? Two worms in you apple what worse than 2 worms in your apple? Two holocausts

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What"s pink and fluffy? Pink fluff.

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A duck walks into a bar and is immediately shot to prevent the spread of bird flu.

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red is red blue is blue derpy derp de derp

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How do you get an annoying baby to shut up? Hit it with a bat

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Knock Knock Who's There Fat white lady with dreadlocks Fat white lady with dreadlocks who? want to buy some girls scout cookies?

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What do you call a kite that doesn't fly. A broken kite.

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Why is Osama bin laden so hard to find? Because he is dead.

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What do you call a black doctor? Doctor.

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What's brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre

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A black man and a midget walk into a bar. They notice the beverages are unreasonably priced so they leave.

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What's worse than stapling a baby to a tree? Stapling the same baby to ten trees.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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