Roses are red Violets are blue Plants are green because of the high levels of mitochondria in their cells.

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What did the man say after being hit by a bus? Nothing he is now dead.

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What's the difference between a Jewish child and pizza? Pizza does not scream in the oven.

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What did the scarf say to the hat? Nothing, a scarf can't talk.

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You know whats funnier than 24? What? 25.

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Who died first the cow or the cow? The Cow

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What's harder than killing a baby? My penis while doing it. by: Lucky7 LG

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The grandfather's grandson said, "They charged me $10 just for a cup of coffee!" The grandfather said, "They charged me with bayonets."

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Why did the african kid die He was mauled by a tiger in a zoo

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- On the cliff edge are standing three people: an Asian, Jewish and black man. Who's going to fall first? - Who's going to care about this?

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There were 3 women, a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. They all had different colors of hair because hair color varies depending on genetics.

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Why did Piglet look in the toilet? He was probably fascinated by the flush.

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Black people stink of shite!

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What do you call a 9 year old with no friends? A Sandyhook survivor.

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Q. What do you say when a baby gets hit by a car? A. Lol fail

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Women's rights.

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Magic! Well not really, you see, people that are stressed have the tendency to remain far longer into the state of hypnosis because their body conciously and subconciously (I am typoing it, but I cant bother to type it correctly fuck it) seek out the state of peace that hypnosis gives more often. Anyway, I know another thing that helps relieve stress, cough... Now, did you know that if you push your nose upwards slightly, you will feel a finger between your legs? its because nerve endings are connected that way, give it a go.

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Two dogs went out for a walk. Then their master took them home.

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Me: What day is it? Rebecca Black: Tuesday

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hohifooncuiohicvsdhn ioshd

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24

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Black Ops? That sounds illegal. Anyway, what do you mean you are a employee only? I mean if you where a fed, you would either be on the top, or be an employee no?

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Me and my wife set and watch the eleven o'clock news every night. My wife always thinks that she has the different disease that is mentioned each day. One night she was practically in tears telling me that she had the disease that was talked about that night. I looked at her and said "honey, there is no way that you have testicular cancer. You don't even have testiculars." The End

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A guy finds a lamp in the desert and rubs it 3 times.. No genie appears because there is no such thing as Magic.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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