What do you call a woman with a penis? A Hermaphrodite.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face (pokerface)

A horse walks into a bar. The barman immediately calls the local stable to report the missing stallion, and his owner promptly arrives to take him home. He thanks the landlord and offers a small reward, but it is respectfully declined.

Two Jews walk into a bar, and they were both served properly

There are 3 type of people in the world. People who can count, and people who can't.

roses are grey, violets are grey, i dont have any cones, just rods.

What do you call a bunny with a knife in his chest? Emo

3 men find a genie lamp on the side of a road, The genie grants them each a wish as they surely deserve. The first man asks for a jet and the genie glady grants him this and the man starts to fly away. The second man says to make a wall around asia and the genie complies. The third man thinks for a minute and finally says fill it with water and as a genie the genie cannot refuse. They all drowned seeing how the jet had no fuel. The genie goes back to sleep and is picked up by an alien 5,000 years in the future, the Earth is destroyed in 7012(as if we didnt already destroy it). The genie survives and currently resides on uranus.

Do you know what's fun about having sex with twenty-seven year-olds? There are twenty of them.

these jokes are terrible, even for anti-jokes

Why did the woman keep getting sexually harassed while calling for her lost dog? Her dog is named "Ilovedicks."

What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? -I don't have a ferrari in my garage.

What do you get when you cross Chuck Norris with a Cheetah? A yellow Chuck Norris with black spots.

What's black, white,and red all over? A crime scene where a black and white man were brutally murdered by a psychopath that is still on the loose and could be killing someone else.

Why did the baby cross the road? cause it was stapled to the chicken.

Wat do you do when you see aomeone bleeding on the ground? Walk away and act like nothing happened

roses are red violets are blue you look like a monkey lets take you to the zoo if by chance you try to escape ill take my fist and smash your little monkey face! btw i made this up if you use it ill kick your nuts!!!!

Your mom is so...wonderful.

What do you call a black man on the side of the road? -A black man who needs a ride.

Did you see that picture of Helen Keller's dad? Yes. She didn't.

88

What's a bit smaller than the tallest man in the world? The 2nd tallest man in the world.

"Welcome to Mcdonalds, Would you like to try our new Chicken BigMac today?" "No"

what did luke say to darth vader? Can i borrow ur car please.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...