What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

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What did the homosexual eat for breakfast? A light meal consisting of fruit and whole grains, so he could keep his weight down.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? Around a thousand pounds.

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Whats orange and has stripes? - a tiger

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How do you kill a blond? You don't. If you do, you'll get reported to the cops and sent to jail.

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what do giraffes have that other animals don't have? -baby giraffes

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Why did the chicken cross the road? know on knows as he can't talk

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Oh look, I've found my knife

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What couldn't the stereotypical pirate get into the movie? Well, considering that the stereotypical pirate existed in the sixteenth to eightteenth centuries and the first motion picture wasn't made until the mid to late nineteenth century, also the technology for time travel does not exist nor has it ever, I would have to derive that he was not let in due to the fact that there was no way for him to ever exist at the same time that a movie would have been playing.

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There was a Priest, a Rabbi, and a Gay Man on a plane. The plane was going down. The Priest said "amen". The Rabbi said "amein". The Gay Man put his penis in the rabbi's asshole.

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What did the republican say to the democrat? You suck!

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Your mommas so fat that she may die.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Awkward silence Awkward silence who? ...

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What's 6 inches long, held in your hand, and has a round tip? A pencil you pervert.

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What did the duck say to the man? Nothing. Ducks cannot talk.

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What did the boy do when he was cold? He got a blanket.

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What do you call a black man on the side of the road? -A black man who needs a ride.

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Why did Michael Jackson ask a Best Buy clerk for the best 3D TV? He didn't ... He's dead.

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Why was school cancelled? Because the school was bombed.

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What's the difference between a white man and a black man? Nothing. They are both created in God's image and likeness so get your mind outta the gutter!

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What's more stinky than a fart? More farts.

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why did the chicken cross the road? It is a domestic bird in the wild that is free to go where ever it wants to, that's why

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A woman got in her car to drive to work. She kept her hands on the wheel and eyes on the road and was able to avoid any accidents that could have occurred.

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how do you make a joke act like yourself

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops