Q: How did the black man get to the first branch on the tree? A: He climbed, like the average person.

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Where did Sally go when the bomb went off? Everywhere.

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A lonely man walks into a Self-Esteem class. He sits alone in the back because of his low self-esteem. Forever alone.

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Knock Knock! Who's there?! Michelle Bachman.

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josh is a skinny headed keppy mong

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What did the deaf person see? He was blind too, so he didn't see anything.

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What do you call a black guy driving an airplane? A pilot

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A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as that could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

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Whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew? Jews are people

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What would a prostitute do if she was given a million dollars? She would probably diversify her portfolio. First, she would pay her rent. She would buy some groceries and a present for her mother. She would then invest it in stocks and low-yield bonds. She would they buy a vehicle. This win might not affect her continuance in her job.

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What do you call a whale driving a plane? A horibble massacre.

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There may be 50 ways to leave your lover, but there are only 4 ways out of this airplane..."

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Q: Why does Bill Gates give so much money to charity? A: Because he wants to improve the lives of his fellow human beings, and also excessive wealth would be detrimental to his children.

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a man checks his brand new cellphone to see if he has a text message... He has cancer

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How do you break up a fight between two blacks I have ADD and Im proud of it

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Nothing.

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Rubies are red Some diamonds are blue I have candy so get in my car

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What did the audience watching inception say at the end ................ WAT THE FUK

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Hillo, its Spodermen, teiling u i fuked ur bich.

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Q: What's worse than 6 dead babies in a trash can? A: One dead baby in 6 trash cans.

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I like U.............................nicorns :D

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If an ugly person got raped. What would that be called? Nothing. It is never gonna happen. Kelvin Yang.

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Ed Milliband knows what's best for the UK.

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hi

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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