What is black, white and red all over? A nun in a blender

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A man walks into a bar. It hurt.

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Why did the fat man fall faster than the skinny man? He didn't. Masses does not affect the speed of falling objects. Everything with mass and volume falls with an acceleration of 9.81m/s^2 on Earth. Therefore the greater mass of the heavier man did not affect his falling speed. Both men fell at the same speed.

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Oh look, I've found my knife

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these jokes are terrible, even for anti-jokes

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How fast is the speed of sex? 70 mph, minimum 40 mph

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What did the Catholic preist say to the altar boy? You've been a good altar boy.

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How do you fit 1,000 Jews in a Volkswagen? Trick question, you can't.

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Who is a nazi? • Theo Kingdom

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Your mom is so...wonderful.

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Women's rights.

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the Batmobile? - "Robin, get in the Batmobile"

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Kid 1: "Want a Hurts Doughnut?" Kid 2: "Umm... sure." Kid 1 opens up a box of freshly baked Hurts doughnut from Hurts Bakery and gives one to kid 2

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A man walked into a bar, he then fell to the ground screaming in pain.

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Me: Knock Knock! You: Door's Open!

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What did the furnace say to the Jew? Nothing, as it is an inanimate object and cannot communicate.

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What's more stinky than a fart? More farts.

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This guys walks in a forest and meets a bear. So he says : - Yo yo, whattup, bear ? And the bear says "ROAR!" Because he's a bear.

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How do you kill a blond? You don't. If you do, you'll get reported to the cops and sent to jail.

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Why did the fireman wear suspenders? To keep his pants up.

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"Ask me if I'm a billboard" "Are you a billboard?" "No"

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69.9

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Why did the women hit the telephone pole? There are many theories but one suggests that it is due to womens statistically lower cognitive spacial reasoning abilities.

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A Polish man came home one day from work, hung up his coat, took off his hat and walked into his bedroom shouting "honey I'm home!" What should he see but his best friend in bed with his wife. Infuriated, he rushed to the cupboard, pulled out his gun, put it to his head, pulled the trigger, and died instantly. His children and lecherous wife are forever scarred.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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