So a baby seal walks into a club.

Why did the girl buy wine? She was hosting a party for four of her closest friends.

i love u. so rate me good or i will talk to my lawyer. nothing personal, i just have no arms, legs, or nose and got broken up with by a girlfriend yesterday (and no, she was not fake) Her name was maria. On the bright side, my grandma woke up this morning!

Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange. Aren't You Glad I Didn't Say Cliterus?

Why do Jewish people like money so much? Because they can exchange it for goods and services

Q: What happened to the teenage girl and the serial rapist at Denny's around midnight? A: They both ordered the french toast Grand Slam breakfast (at Denny's, its breakfast any time!!).

America Votes

what is long,hard and holds semen,a submarine , i spelled seamen wrong

Why did the black man steal purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon? Because it was the birthday of his 8 year old daughter with autism and she loves purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon and he was very poor and wanted to make his little girl happy for once.

WOMENS RIGHTS

Why was the asian boy get straight A's? He paid attention during class, took good notes, studied at home, and had a personal drive that lead him to be a good student.

What do you call a man with three testicles? Polyorchid. Look it up.

why did the boy drop his ice cream? he tripped over his mother's dead body

Q: what is more sad than being alone A: being alone with lots of cats

what did the hobo do when he saw timmy get hit by the bus and drop his ice cream? stole the ice cream and laughed

Hey Tim lets think of a joke

Two black guys walk into a country club and ask to play a round of golf. They are turned away because the aren't members of the club.

Why was the boy sad? His friend stabbed him with a fork. Also, his mother died. Also, his dad raped him Also, he has a chode. And it really sucks when you have a chode.

i'm a loser with body odor.. plus i play pokemon to pass the time because reality is just to horrible to face. guess who? josh wood.

Knock Knock "Who's There?" *No answer* The man proceeds to go on with his life

What's the difference between me and a dead baby? I'm not dead, or a baby. I am well into my teens and very healthy.

What do you call a donkey walking backwards a confused donkey

A bear walks into a bar. The building is evacuated swiftly but several people are killed

There are 3 type of people in the world. People who can count, and people who can't.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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