Knock Knock Who's there? Boo Were your parents drunk when they named you?

Why did Jack and Jill go up the hill? To get to their house.

how do you make a joke act like yourself

What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Hey, where'd my tractor go?

penis

whats annoying and black? black people

What kind of animal eats and pisses on everything? Your mother. -Avery Vartanian

34

what the hell happened to your face

Why was school cancelled? Because the school was bombed.

*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and think it's original because I changed one word*

Q: why are kittens so cute? A: because god created them that way. go fourth and enjoy kittens.

Why was six afraid of seven? Fishsticks

Knock, Knock. Come in.

What's red and spins real fast? Not a dead baby in a blender, babies can't fit in there. Unless of course you dismember them. but that's obsurd. . . Kinda

What did one muffin in the oven say to the other muffin Nothing food doesn't talk

i love u. so rate me good or i will talk to my lawyer. nothing personal, i just have no arms, legs, or nose and got broken up with by a girlfriend yesterday (and no, she was not fake) Her name was maria. On the bright side, my grandma woke up this morning!

(Q) Why did the little boy cross the road? (A) To get to the police officer. (Q) Why did the little boy need the police officer? (A) because he was raped.

How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

A horse walks into a bar The bartender says "Haha, sucker, this is actually a glue factory" The horse is brutally slaughtered and his remains are sold for a profit as part of a glue product

What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the Batmobile? - "Robin, get in the Batmobile"

Kid 1: "Want a Hurts Doughnut?" Kid 2: "Umm... sure." Kid 1 opens up a box of freshly baked Hurts doughnut from Hurts Bakery and gives one to kid 2

what is long,hard and holds semen,a submarine , i spelled seamen wrong

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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