Two reporters walk into Tah rir Square. Both are abused and that's sad.

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How do you kill Lady Gaga? There is no point in trying, she is too heavily guarded.

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Yo mama so old, she used to babysit Dumbledore

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How can you tell if someone is a Mexican? Ask them politely if they're Mexican

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What did the cashier say to the blonde? That will be $5.39, would you like a receipt?

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Why was the door opened? Because I opened it

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What types of animals are the most dangerous? Dangerous ones.

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Why did Billy stop playing baseball? He lost his legs to cancer. Poor Billy.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing She had no arms Knock knock. Who's there? Not sally

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Why did Lucy have blond hair? Answer: Because both her parents had recessive hair traits.

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Knock knock

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A man and a woman walk into a bar... They both die from cerebral hemorrhages.

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Go away nothing to see here,. I said go away

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Why didn't the TV turn on? Nobody switched it on.

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Q: Hey, wanna hear a joke? A: Sure! Q: Alright, cool. *leaves*

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Why did susie fall off the swing? Because an arrow penetrated her head.

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Q: What's worse than 6 dead babies in a trash can? A: One dead baby in 6 trash cans.

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If your Uncle Jack helped you off an elephant, would you help your Uncle jackoff an elephant? Probably not because it would take more than 3 hands to jack off an elephant P.S. Your Uncle Jack only has 1 hand. Your uncle was on a swing and a clown cut off his hand with an ax

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A muslim walks into an airport. He then buys his ticket, boards his plane, and his flown to his proper destination.

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If life gives you melons, you're probably dyslexic.

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your mother is a well respected woman in society and makes delicious cookies.

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How did the blond become a pilot? By attending flight school, graduating, applying to an airline to which she subsequently was hired to, taking frequent training courses, and beginning work.

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What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

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Your mother is so classy, when I asked her to order at a fast food drive through she decided to park the car a eat inside.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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