What do you call 4 black men in a BMW? Successful Businessmen.

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The family performs an array of disgusting sexual acts. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "It has no name."

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how do you punish helen keller? leave the plunger in the toilet.

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Holocaust jokes are not funny. And I don't see the humor behind them.

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Why did the man start vacuuming his neighbor's floor? He had to get the GSR

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Two hunters are out in the woods, one of them collapses on the ground and his eyes roll back in his head. His friend whips out his cell phone and calls 911. He gasps,"I think my friend is dead, what do i do?" The operator says,"calm down lets first make sure he's dead." There's a silence, then a shot. Sadly the man was not dead but extremely tired and could not carry on without rest.

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Your mom went to college

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How do you say cabbage in Spanish? You don't.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh

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Why are you bored? because fungus grows in your eyeballs so you try to stab it out but you end up blind and dead lol

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When Geese fly in their 'V' formation, why is one line bigger than the other? There's more geese in that line.

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There once was an old lady who lived in a shoe. She had so many children, her vagina fell off.

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I know a black person. His name is Mikey.

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What do have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in sand? What you probably have is a lawyer on holiday with his children, allowing himself or herself to be buried in order to please said children.

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What did the zombie say to the woman? I like turtles.

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What do you call a guy with no arms, no legs, and floats? Nothing, its rude to make fun of disabilities.

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why can't hellen keller eat a pizza? because she is dead.

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How do you stop a dog from humping your leg? A: Pick him up and suck on his wang!

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Why couldn't Little Johnny read his 3rd grade novel? His was repeatedly stabbed in his eyes.

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Yo mama's so fat, she has low self-esteem.

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What did bob say when he was told his beloved parents were dying? "oh"

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Whats the difference between cats and dogs? ....cats suck

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How are Lamborghinis and piles of dead babies alike? I don't have either in my garage. Except for the pile of dead babies.

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laughter is the best medicine, unless you have cancer...you will die

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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