Q: why cant elvis draw a picture. A: cause hes dead.

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What did the clinically depressed man get for Christmas? He received many of splendid gifts and a joyous day with his family. He realized that his life isn't so bad after all, and went home with his head held high. He was then eaten by a vicious looking 7.

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Who paved the road? The fat guy with the steam roller

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I'm on the seafood diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

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What do you do when a black person steals your computer Inform the authorities, as theft is a felony.

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So a baby seal walks into a club

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Whats bright red and claws at the window? Baby in a microwave.

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Why did the man die? He helped others before placing his own oxygen mask on.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Canoe Well one is a human, beating heart, and the other is a small boat you row in

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So a platypus walks into a bar. He orders a drink and then goes home drunk. His wife doesn't approve of his drinking, so she took her children then left. The lonely platypus wandered around for days on end in the lonely silence. He realized he wanted a job, but he couldn't get one, and i lied. it wasnt a platypus. it never even haooened i wasted your time.

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what has two feet and is black all over? your mom after she died in a horrific house fire.

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What's red and looks like a bucket? A red bucket.

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What do you call 100 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean? A weird kind of genocide.

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You just wasted time of your life reading this, and perhaps even more wasted time thumbing this down.

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Whats red and bad for your teeth? Bricks

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because he got hit by a fridge. Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she got hit by a fridge. Why couldn't the cat drink its milk? Because it had no face.

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2 nuns in the bath, One says "wears the soap" the other says "Over there, next to the shampoo"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. Traffic was too backed-up so the chicken took a different route.

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Why did the boy throw butter out the window? To test the principles of gravity.

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What do you do when you see a person sleeping at a bus stop? You fart on their head

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how do u talk to a person you like go up and talk to them

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why couldnt the black man fly, becuse his master said he coudnt.

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How do you make a tissue dance? You give it dance lessons.

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1 out of 4 questions. How do you get a girrafe in a fridge? Open it, put the girrafe in, and close it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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