Did you know that onions is the only food that makes you cry? Oh? Really? Positive. what if I threw a coconut at you're face. ...

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A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are all on a deserted island with no food or water. The redhead decides to try and swim to safety, but after a few hours of swimming she becomes to tired to carry on and drowns. After knowing their friend died, the two other women decide that swimming is not a viable option for rescue, so they decide to stay on the island. A few days later a search party rescues them.

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has anybody else just skipped to the short ones

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A have a black guy in my family tree. He married my cousin a few years back

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knok knok whos there know one cares your gay

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I found out I had asthma earlier today. I was breathless.

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Why was Rodney afraid of Chung Lee? Because Chung Lee is an intimidating person, capable of literally ripping your face off.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimers, Bus....

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How many police officers does it take to secure 3 hooded black men? However many police are on duty.

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Ask me if I'm a tree I don't need to, because I know you're not a tree

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Why did the bird fall down? It got shot.

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If you watch the titanic backwards, its really about a magical ship which saves peoples lives!

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What's black and blue and hates sex? The ten year old in my trunk

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Incorrect. Violets are violet. DERP!

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A man walks into a coffee shop and buys a bookshelf.

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A horse walks into a bar. bar tender: "Why the long face" *bu dum tss" horse: "My wife died of terminal cancer."

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3 Chinese brothers (chu, bu, and fu) come to America and want to change there names. Chu becomes Chuck, Bu becomes Buck, and Fu becomes Tom because obscenities do not make acceptable names.

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Why are apples cheaper than lemons? Because you have to pay less money then lemons to buy them

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Britney got to the top of the building. What did she do next? She jumped off to end her miserable life

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Two mice fell into a bucket of cream. They both promptly drowned.

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What do you call a fish without an eye? Impaired of vision.

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whats worse than a baby in a bathtub? its dead. Whats worse than that? its in a clown suit. Whats worse than that? The baby had down syndrome.

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? A watermelon doesn't scream when you cut it open.

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man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasnt that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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