a man walks into a bar. ouch. that must suck, but he should really look where he's going

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Why did the man fall on the floor? He had a heart attack.

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When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

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What do u call a Mexican on the moon? An astronaut. What do u call all the Mexicans on the moon? Problem solved!!!

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What did the Joker say to Batman? Why are we wearing these stupid costumes

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whats it called when you see a ton of white people running down a hill.... an avalanch whats it called when you see a ton of black people running down a hill.....a mud slide whats it called when you see a ton of mexicans running down a hill............ a jail break

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roses are red violets are blue this verse doesn't ryhme and neither does this one

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Bruce Forsith's energy and charisma.

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Whats green and fuzy and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

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knock knock. who's there? interrupting cow. interrupting cow wh... Your mom's a wh0re.

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Why did Sara fell off her swing? She has no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sara

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"Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "Interrupting Owl." "Interrupting Owl who?"

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What did the old man say to kid who was begging to his mommy? Shut up.

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Hello we are from the church of the latter day saints.

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Whats green, has four legs, and falls out of a tree? A Pool Table. Use your imagination.

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Two guys stopped at a restaurant for coffee. "I'll have a mug of strong coffee," said the first. The second said, " I'll have strong coffee too, but I want a clean mug." The waiter returns and says, "which one of you wants the clean mug?"

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why did the baby stop crying his mother killed him with an axe

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Rick Santorum 2012

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What do you say to an over weight Jewish mother? "Work on those crunches" He was her coach.

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Q:What do you call chocolate without a gag reflex? A: Choc-o-late (Choke a lot)

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Why do people insist on drinking diet soda meanwhile eating extremely unhealthy food? Because some people like the taste of diet soda over regular soda.

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Asians

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What's funnier than 24? Many things, the number 24 is not very humorous.

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Why did the pilot crash the plane? Because it wasn't a pilot it was a toaster.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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