When I'm through with you... They will never find your body... And even if they did... All they find would be teeth!!!

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Why didn't little Jimmy eat his dinner? Jimmy didn't eat his dinner because there was no food. Jimmy is a poor street urchin who died of starvation.

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How do you put a giraffe in a refrigerator? You open the door, put the giraffe in and close the door. How do you put an elephant in a refrigerator?. . . . . . No! You open the door, TAKE THE GIRAFFE OUT, and put the elephant in. So, the lion calls a meating in the animal kingdom and who's not there? The elephant, he's in the refrigerator. You have to cross a river infested with crocodiles, and you don't have a boat. How do you get across?. . . . . . No! You get in the river and swim across because the crocodiles are at the meating with the lion!

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Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

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What is worst about the great white shark? It's hundreds of sharp teeth, strong tail, or subtle racism? Probably the teeth.

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Q: What's multicoloured and spins around while screaming in agony? A: A clown in a washing machine.

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hello

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a man walks into a bar and quickly notices a young lady having a drink. He sits beside her and asks 'why the long face?' 'My mother was raped by a horse.'

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Penis.

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*Knock Knock* Who's there? It's Jeff. Hi there Jeff, come in, the doors open.

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What do you get when you cross a cat and a dog? an email from PETA

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Why was the middle-aged doctor morbidly obese? He liked bacon and was severely hypocritical.

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Why little Susie often molested as a child? She was probably a good-looking child.

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when life gives you lemons, you should go to the hospital as you may have dyslexia

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What does a gay horse eat? Other gay horses.

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Q: What did the ant say to the bush? A: Ernest Borgnine

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have alzheimers, Roses are red

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Beth got an aunt farm for her birthday.

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Roses are gray, violets are gray. I am a dog.

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whats worse than a wussy times two a wusst times three i like boobs u basterds suck a dick

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You're on a bus and the driver is black, you're white friend turns to you and says, We're gonna have a race on the highway!

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how many cucumbers dos it take to change a light bulb? none. cucumbers cant change light bulbs. dumbass.

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What did the rabbit buy the Jewish duck for Hanukkah? Nothing, animals don't celebrate holidays.

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Ron Paul for President!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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